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[The Spiritual Ahlian]
*Tabitha Elaina Hsu
*SWEET 19 this year
*A believer of christ also a princess in the heavenly kingdom
*Born in a rich family
*daddy & mummie's damn damn precious pearl
*Her biological father and haevenly father is rich
*so she used to living Da Xiao Jie's life
*she is a girl who love roses
*somehow to be spoiled
*shy & girly
*playful also witty

*simple but unpredictable
*ordinary but does the extraordinary
*do the ridicious but perform miracious
*so yyou wanna know a girl like me ?

**Now she starting to knows what is love
From that day on , she decided to love everyone
Like the one in heaven has love her...
She is devoted to her caring for people...
And also a trustworthy
Cast your troubles on her because she CARES
***i'm worth a sum which no one will be never be able to afford...
there's only god can afford the price to make me his
even the most high & mighty valued me
so you think you have the rights to depreciate me ?
LOVE ME TENDER ... thanks

A Big NO NO to :

*bastards and bitches
*those who think too highly of themselves
*those who look down on others
*those who scheme
*insensitive people
*pretectous people
*those preciated my worth
** I strongly detest them, so you're one of the kind above
you jolly well LEAVE !!!

Heart Desires:
Fixed assets

*BLOODLY good result
*get married
*go clubbing (fulfilled)
*new make up set
*extreme make over
*more skirts and dress
*beautiful heels
*learnt to swim dolphin style
*act as mermaid in a movie
Intangible Assets
*rise up in cell by the age of 22
*return to usher ministy by 2010
*more mature
*HE will treasure me more =) *A MIRACLE FOR THE RELATIONSHIP =)
Current assets
*to own a bed of roses
*increase of cash in hand
*visit japan

DO Try It Out
Your Spiritual Number is Six
You bring communication and empathy into people's lives.
You are very open and understanding. You can accept difficult people.

Right now, your life is about being understood. You have trouble with your own vulnerability.
You end up playing the role of therapist in relationships, and it's hard to get people to ask about you.

You will take time out for those you love, even if you don't have much time. You can't help but be nurturing.
You are very responsible and ethical. You deliver on your promises.
What's Your Spiritual Number?
Your Life Is Worth...
$1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000
How Much Is Your Life Worth?
You Are a Mermaid
You are a total daydreamer, and people tend to think you're flakier than you actually are.
While your head is often in the clouds, you'll always come back to earth to help someone in need.
Beyond being a caring person, you are also very intelligent and rational.
You understand the connections of the universe better than almost anyone else.
What Mythological Creature Are You?
You are 100% Sagittarius
How Sagittarius Are You?
You Should Be A Sagittarius
What's good about you: bold and adventure loving, life is one big party for you

What's bad about you: you don't think before speaking - and you often regret it!

In love: you're flirtatiously playful, but you never play games

In friendship, you're: the one who keeps everyone laughing

Your ideal job: fortune teller, philosopher, or athlete

Your sense of fashion: your own mix of vintage and new pieces

You like to pig out on: anything you haven't tried before
What Sign Should You Be?
You Should Be With an Earth Sign!
Your best match is a Taurus, Virgo, or Capricorn

Why? You like your guys to pamper, wine, and dine you
Not that you're a gold digger, you just like the finer things
An Earth Sign will go all out to woo you - and enjoy doing it
And you'll never find a more trustworthy or loyal match!
What Sign Guy Should You Date?
Your Fashion Style is Girly
You dress to look beautiful and show off what you've got
Dresses, skirts, heels... whatever it takes to turn heads
You love feeling like a girl in any setting
Even your workout clothes are cute and feminine!
What Kind of Fashionable Woman Are You?
Your Birthdate: November 27
You are a spiritual soul - a person who tries to find meaning in everything.
You spend a good amount of time meditating, trying to figure out life.
Helping others is also important to you. You enjoy social activities with that goal.
You are very generous and giving. Yet you expect very little in return.

Your strength: Getting along with anyone and everyone

Your weakness: Needing a good amount of downtime to recharge

Your power color: Cobalt blue

Your power symbol: Dove

Your power month: September
What Does Your Birth Date Mean?
Your Birth Month is November
Tolerant and inspirational, you are wise beyond your years.
You are universally sympathetic and a great humanitarian.

Your soul reflects: Compassion, friendship, and secret love

Your gemstone: Citrine

Your flower: Chrysanthemum

Your colors: Dark blue, red, and yellow
What Does Your Birth Month Mean?
Your Birthdate: November 27
For you, love is a feeling that lingers for really long time - even after a relationship is totally over.
In fact, you still make have strong feelings for the first person you fell in love with.
You usually are reluctant to end relationships. And sometimes you're the last to know that things are ending!

Number of True Loves You'll Have: 5

Number of Times You'll Have Your Heart Broken: 5

You are most compatible with people born on the 9th, 18th, and 27th of the month.
What Does Your Birth Date Mean For Your Love Life?
You Should Rule Venus
Venus is a mysterious, stormy planet - shrouded in a thick layer of clouds.

You are perfect to rule Venus, because you are quite emotional and volatile yourself.
Your emotions change as rapidly as the weather on Venus, and both you and the planet are incomprehensible to others.

While you are not a logical thinker, you are quite empathetic.
You can care for and understand others, but your emotions swirl too quickly to truly understand yourself.
What Planet Should You Rule?
You Are From Venus
You love all forms of beauty. You love dressing up and anything luxurious.
A social butterfly, you're incredibly popular and a great host.
You're known for your fairness and affection. And as a frind to all.
Careful though! You're desire to please may make you too willing to conform.
Be yourself. Focus on what matters to you. You'll be all the more popular for it.
What Planet Are You From?
You Are A Woman!
Congratulations, you've made it to adulthood.
You're emotionally mature, responsible, and unlikely to act out.
You accept that life is hard - and do your best to keep things upbeat.
This makes you the perfect girlfriend... or even wife!
Are You A Girl Or a Woman?
Guys Like That You're Sensitive
And not in that "cry at a drop of a hat" sort of way
You just get most guys - even if you're not trying to
Guys find it is easy to confide in you and tell you their secrets
No wonder you tend to get close quickly in relationships!
What Do Guys Like About You?
Your Love is Based on Passion
When you're in love, you're brimming with emotions and desire.
For you, love can be a crazy frenzy - but somehow it all makes sense.
Love is the most important thing to you. You are capable of doing anything for love.
(This makes you very lovable... but also a little scary!)

Why your love can last: You've got the true attraction, bond, and euphoria to make it happen.

Why your love can fail: Love isn't something you really think through. Your roller coaster relationships sometimes end on a terrifying note.
What Is Your Love Based On?
Your Love Life is Like Titanic
"Promise me you'll survive. That you won't give up, no matter what happens, no matter how hopeless."

You think that you only really have one true love in your life. And that you better to anything and everything to be with that person.
You tend to be very nostalgic about past loves that didn't work out. There are many secret feelings that you keep to yourself.

Your love style: Deep and emotional

Your Hollywood Ending Will Be: Bittersweet
What Movie Is Your Love Life Like?
You'll Find Love Where You Least Expect It
You're the type most likely to find love... surprised?
You shouldn't be! You're a fun, independent woman who is always out and about.
And you're smart to sometimes leave your girlfriends behind and go it alone.
Men love to approach you when you're out by yourself - including Mr. Perfect!
Where Will You Find Your Dream Guy?
Your Love Element Is Earth
In love, you have consistency and integrity.
For you, love is all about staying grounded and centered.

You attract others with your zest for life and experiences.
Your flirting style is defined by setting the scene, creating a unique moment in time.

Steady progress and stability are the cornerstones of your love life.
You may take things too slowly, but you never put your heart at risk.

You connect best with: Fire

Avoid: Wood

You and another Earth element: need each other too much to build a good foundation
What Element Is Your Love?
You are a Total Romantic
For you, love is like a fairy tale.
Or magic. Or a Meg Ryan movie.
Problem is, you sort of want all three.

You bring the spark in the relationship
In turn, you expect your guy to keep the fire burning
Not a bad deal, as long as you find the right Prince.
Are You a Romantic or Realistic Girl?
You are a Great Girlfriend
When it comes to your guy, you're very thoughtful
But you also haven't stopped thinking of yourself
You're the perfect blend of independent and caring
You're a total catch - make sure your guy knows it too!
Are You a Good Girlfriend?
You Are a Total Girlie Girl
You love looking good, and wooing men with your womanly ways.
You're so feminine, men are in awe of you ... which is a very good thing.
How Feminine Are You?
You Are a Super Flirt
You love to flirt, so much so that it gets you in trouble.
In almost any situation, you find yourself flirting - even when it's inappropriate.
You tend to embrace all flirting styles too.. from coy to sexy to playful to serious.
And if someone flirts back, you'll crank it up even more!
What Kind of Flirt Are You?
Your Seduction Style: The Coquette
You are a pro at playing the age old game of hard to get.
Your flirting style runs hot and cold, giving just enough to keep them chasing you.
Independent and self-sufficient, you don't need any one person to make you compelte.
And that independence is exactly what makes people pursue you.
What Is Your Seduction Style?
Your Beauty Element is Fire
Wild and sexy, you keep your beauty style smokin' hot.
You're not afraid of glamour or showing off your assets!
What's Your Beauty Element?
Colorful and Sexy
Confident and outrageous, you have the personality to wear a dress that really turns heads.
What's Your Prom Style?
Your Scent is Key Lime
Sassy, real, and totally smooth
You're a total flirt who's always ready for a challenge!
What's Your Girl Smell?
What Your White Outfit Means
You're a natural beauty - and you never let your fashion steal the show.
You have a quiet confidence that you'll look great in almost anything.
While you may feel understated, men are attracted to your mystery.

Designer match: Gucci

Signature accessory: A cashmere scarf
How Your Favorite Outfit Tells What Kind of Girl You Are
Halloween Horoscope for Sagittarius
Halloween is your time to be flirtatious, sexy, and hot hot hot!
You love to tempt people into evil, even if it's just for one night.

Costume suggestions: A sexy devil or a dark fairy

Signature Halloween candy: Anything spiked with booze
What's Your Halloween Horoscope?
You Are a Flawless Beauty!
When it comes to beauty, you spare no expense - and it shows
You're the kind of woman a man would launch a thousand ships for
It's hard for anyone to beat you in the beauty department
But remember, it's okay to show a flaw or too - you've got plenty to spare
What Type of Beauty Are You?
You Are A Chocolate Ice Cream Girl
Dramatic. Powerful. Flirty.
What Flavor Ice Cream Girl Are You?
Your Kisses Are Medium-Hot
Your kisses are definitely sexy, but you're not about to make anyone gasp for air.
You take it slow and steady... and you ramp things up when you get the right signals.
Your kissing style is adaptable and adept. And people who kiss you love it!
How Hot Are Your Kisses?
You Are a Soft Kisser
Your kissing style is understated, but effective

You give soft, sweet, and soulful kisses.

And the key is, you only give kisses to someone incredibly special

Because you don't just go around kissing anyone
What's Your Kissing Style?
Your Kissing Grade: B-
You are a good kisser, and your kisses definitely leave a mark.
As you know, there's always room for a little improvement when it comes to kissing.
Try to figure out what your kissing partner really likes, and customize your kissing style just for them!
How Do Your Kisses Rate?
Your Kiss is Pink
For you, kissing is pure happiness... simple as that.
You definitely get a little blissed out from kissing, even if you're a bit shy about it.
You won't kiss just anyone. Your kisses are special!
Young at heart, you still get very excited the first time you kiss someone.

Kissing Type: Generous

People See Your Kisses as: Sweet

You Kiss Best With: A Black Kisser

Stay away from: An Orange Kisser
What Color Is Your Kiss?
You Are a Rose
You are a total alpha dog who tends to be a leader.
Your friends depend on you to hold things together and make decisions.
Potential lovers are drawn to your raw power and strength.
While you are the center of attention, you are secretly introverted and a bit shy.
What Flower Are You?
Your Love Is Represented By a Red Rose
You love passionately and fully, without any reservations.
And while romantic love comes easily for you, you also love many people platonically.
You are a true romantic, and you always can see the best in people.
What Rose Represents Your Love?
You Are a White Rose
You represent youthfulness and purity.

Your vibe: Sweet and heavenly

Falling in love with you: is like falling in love for the first time
What Color Rose Are You?
You Are 88% Feminine, 12% Masculine
You are totally in touch with your feminine side.
Chances are, you are a very typical woman.
And if you're a guy, then you're just super sensitive.
Are You Masculine or Feminine?
Your Personality is Somewhat Rare (ESFP)
Your personality type is playful, charming, open minded, and energetic.

Only about 7% of all people have your personality, including 9% of all women and 5% of all men
You are Extroverted, Sensing, Feeling, and Perceiving.
How Rare Is Your Personality?
You Are Psyche!
Eternally in search of purpose and insight.
You're curious and creative with a total sense of wonder.
Totally empathetic, you pick up on other's moods easily.
Just be sure to pamper yourself as well!
What Goddess Are You?
Your Personality Profile
You are dreamy, peaceful, and young at heart.
Optimistic and caring, you tend to see the best in people.
You tend to be always smiling - and making others smile.

You are shy and intelligent... and a very hard worker.
You're also funny, but many people don't see your funny side.
Your subtle dry humor leaves your close friends in stitches.
The World's Shortest Personality Test
Men See You As Desirable
Men often find you immediately attractive and sensual
You're honesty is refreshingly beautiful ... it draws guys in
You are also able to be open with your feelings with no emotional baggage
Packing light means you enjoy new relationships easily
How Do Men See You?
You Can Make 75% of Your Crushes Fall in Love With You
Your seduction skills are practically legendary. You know how to close the deal.
Just don't let someone you're really into get the better of you!
As long as you keep up your end of the flirting game, you'll get the prize at the end.
Can You Make Anyone Fall in Love With You?
Your Inner Pop Princess Is Hilary Duff
"I'm shedding
Shedding every color
Trying to find a pigment of truth
Beneath my skin"

You're sweet and cute, but a little more complex than that.
Who's Your Inner Pop Princess?
Your Psyche is Blue
You are deeply emotional and very connected to everything (and everyone) around you.
By simply understanding other people, you are able to help them heal and let go.
While you are a very deep and thoughtful person, you do have a very silly, superficial side.

When you are too blue: the weight of the world's problems hangs over you

When you don't have enough blue: you lack perspective and understanding
What Color Is Your Psyche?
The Part of You That No One Sees
You are passionate, romantic, and emotional.
You put love first in your life, even though you have often been disappointed by it.
You expect to be swept of your feet, and you never expect infatuation to die out.

Underneath it all, you are scared that you aren't lovable.
Your insecurity has ruined many relationships, as you are unable to see the love that's really there.
You are secretly afraid of being alone. Confronting your insecurities is incredibly painful.
What's the Part of You That No One Sees?
You Are a Newborn Soul
You are tolerant, accepting, and willing to give anyone a chance.
On the flip side, you're easy to read and easily influenced by others.
You have a fresh perspective on life, and you can be very creative.
Noconformist and nontraditional, you've never met anyone who's like you.

Inventive and artistic, you like to be a trendsetter.
You have an upbeat spirit and you like almost everything.
You make friends easily and often have long standing friendships.
Implusive and trusting, you fall in love a little too easily.

Souls you are most compatible with: Bright Star Soul and Dreaming Soul
What Kind of Soul Are You?
You are a Believer
You believe in God and your chosen religion.
Whether you're Christian, Muslim, Jewish, or Hindu..
Your convictions are strong and unwavering.
You think your religion is the one true way, for everyone.
What's Your Religious Philosophy?
You Are a Believer
You definitely believe in God - and you're very unwavering in your religious beliefs.
In fact, religion and spirituality are definitely big parts of your life.
Religion shapes how you view right and wrong, as well as the decisions you make.
It's hard for you to imagine how your life would be without your beliefs.
Are You an Atheist, Agnostic or a Believer?
What Your Soul Really Looks Like
You are a warm hearted and open minded person. It's easy for you to forgive and forget.

You are not a very grounded person. You prefer dreams to reality. For you, it's all about possibilities.

You see yourself with pretty objective eyes. How you view yourself is almost exactly how other people view you.

Your near future is a lot like the present, and as far as you're concerned, that's a very good thing.

For you, love is all about caring and comfort. You couldn't fall in love with someone you didn't trust.
Inside the Room of Your Soul
You Are 20% Boyish and 80% Girlish
Even if you're not a girl, you're very feminine.
You're in touch with your feelings, and your heart rules you.
A bit of a emotional roller coaster, one moment you're up and the next you're down.
But no matter what, you try to be as cute and perky as possible.
How Boyish or Girlish Are You?
You Communicate Like a Woman
You empathize, talk things out, and express your emotions freely.
You're a good listener, and you're non-judgmental with your advice.
Communication is how you connect with people.
You're always up for a long talk, no matter how difficult the subject matter is.
Do You Communicate Like a Man or a Woman?
Your Candy Heart Says "Hug Me"
A total sweetheart, you always have a lot of love to give out.
Your heart is open to where ever love takes you!

Your ideal Valentine's Day date: a surprise romantic evening that you've planned out

Your flirting style: lots of listening and talking

What turns you off: fighting and conflict

Why you're hot: you're fearless about falling in love
What Does Your Candy Heart Say?
You Are a Red Flower
A red flower tends to represent power, seduction, and desire.
At times, you are loving like a red tulip.
And at other times, you're very enthusiastic, like a bouvardia.
And more than you wish, your passion is a bit overwhelming, like a red rose.
What Color Flower Are You?
You Are a Fierce Femme
You have a wild side, and you aren't afraid to bring it out when the time is right.
But you also know when to hang back and keep your "crazy chick" persona in check.
In fact, some of your friends may be surprised to find out how far you can take it...
You may look mild mannered, but it's all an act!
Are You a Daring Woman?
Your Passion is Pink
Innocent and naive, you approach sex with a virginal mindset.
You tend to enjoy teasing and flaunting much more than actual sex.
You're a notorious flirt, and you can pick up anyone you desire.
As a result, your reputation is a lot steamier than your real sex life.
What Color Is Your Passion?
Your Reputation Is: Sweet Girl
While you're well known, there's nothing to worry about.
You're reputation is mostly good - as good as any rep can be.
Do You Have A Bad Girl Reputation?
Your Lust Quotient: 55%
You are definitely a lustful person, but you do a good job of hiding it.
Your friends would be surprised to know that your secretly very wild!
How Much Lust Do You Have?
You Are a Pretty Good Liar
Your lies are somewhat believable, but sometimes you get caught.
Work on keeping your body language and emotions calm. And you'll be a better liar in no time!
Are You a Good Liar?
Your Gemstone is Ruby
Daring, enthusiastic, and spontaneous.
You are energetic and passionate, with an appetite for life.
What Gemstone Are You?
You Are Somewhat Honest
You do tend to tell the truth a lot
But you also stretch the truth on occasion
You figure a little lie isn't a big deal
As long as it doesn't hurt anyone too much!
How Honest Are You?
You Are 39% Fake
The real you is something you embrace and don't mind enhancing.
You know that a few beauty secrets aren't a big deal, as long as you look good.
Are You A Fake Girl?
You Are 61% Real
You know who you are, and you're pretty darn comfortable with yourself.
Like everyone, you struggle with the parts of yourself that aren't so great...
But you're good at accepting who you are and not dwelling on your faults.
As a result, you're confident, optimistic, and very real.
How Real Are You?
Your Life is Rated PG-13
Your life isn't totally scandalous, but you definitely don't shy away from adult themes!
What is Your Life Rated?
Your Mind is NC-17 Rated
You're mind is so filthy... you should should be washing every part of you out with soap.
If your thoughts can go dirty, they do. Almost everything is NC-17 to you!
Do You Have a Dirty Mind?
You are SO Jealous
You can't help but doubt your boyfriend, friends, and even family
You've been burned before - and it totally shows
But acting like a guard dog won't keep your guy... it will only push him away
Learn to trust a little more, and *all* your relationships will be better
Are You A Jealous Woman?
You Are 36% Evil
A bit of evil lurks in your heart, but you hide it well.
In some ways, you are the most dangerous kind of evil.
How Evil Are You?
You Are a Frappacino
At your best, you are: fun loving, sweet, and modern

At your worst, you are: childish and over indulgent

You drink coffee when: you're craving something sweet

Your caffeine addiction level: low
What Kind of Coffee Are You?
Java Chip Frappuccino
You're a caffeine addict and pretty high maintenance about your coffee. There's a good chance that everyone at your Starbucks knows your name.
What Flavor Frappuccino Are You?
You Are a Cookie-Browine-Sundae
Totally sweet, delicious, and comforting.
You are a total glutton for... everything!
What Kind of Sundae Are You?
You Are Sunrise
You enjoy living a slow, fulfilling life. You enjoy living every moment, no matter how ordinary.
You are a person of reflection and meditation. You start and end every day by looking inward.
Caring and giving, you enjoy making people happy. You're often cooking for friends or buying them gifts.
All in all, you know how to love life for what it is - not for how it should be.
What Time Of Day Are You?
You are White Chocolate
You are White Chocolate
You are sweet, caring, and truly very innocent.
Whether your naive ways are a bit of act or not, people like to take care of you.
You are a quiet flirt, and your power is often underestimated!
What Kind of Chocolate Are You?
Your Deadly Sins
Envy: 80%

Pride: 80%

Sloth: 80%

Gluttony: 60%

Wrath: 60%

Greed: 40%

Lust: 40%

Chance You'll Go to Hell: 63%

You will die at the hands of a jealous lover. How ironic.
How Sinful Are You?
You Are 72% Spoiled
You're pretty spoiled, but you probably don't think you're spoiled enough.
No doubt about it, you're living the good life. Maybe a little too good!
Are You Spoiled?
You Are Strawberry Cake
Fresh, sassy, and romantic.
You're a total flirt, who never would turn down a sugary treat.
Occasionally you're a bit moody - but you usually stay sweet!
What Kind of Cake Are You?
You Are The Empress
You represent the ideal female figure: beauty and nurturing.
You bring security and harmony to many.
At times, you are also a very sensual person.
You are characterized by love, pleasure, and desire.

Your fortune:

You need to take some time to think about the role of commitment in your life.
It's possible you need to commit more to others, or deal with how others have treated you.
It is very important for you to support your friends and family right now, difficult as it may be.
You may need to look at your relationship with your mother, or your relationships as a mother.
What Tarot Card Are You?

You are The Empress Beauty, happiness, pleasure, success, luxury, dissipation. The Empress is associated with Venus, the feminine planet, so it represents, beauty, charm, pleasure, luxury, and delight. You may be good at home decorating, art or anything to do with making things beautiful. The Empress is a creator, be it creation of life, of romance, of art or business. While the Magician is the primal spark, the idea made real, and the High Priestess is the one who gives the idea a form, the Empress is the womb where it gestates and grows till it is ready to be born. This is why her symbol is Venus, goddess of beautiful things as well as love. Even so, the Empress is more Demeter, goddess of abundance, then sensual Venus. She is the giver of Earthly gifts, yet at the same time, she can, in anger withhold, as Demeter did when her daughter, Persephone, was kidnapped. In fury and grief, she kept the Earth barren till her child was returned to her.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

You Are Winter!
Intelligent
Serious
Cozy
Calm
Shy
What Season Woman Are You?
Start Hunting For That New Apartment
You two are ready to live together - and probably have been for a while
You're a perfect match, even if you don't agree on everything
What's important is compromise... a skill you and your guy have mastered
So head out to Bed, Bath, and Beyond. It's time for your new life together!
Should You Live With Your Boyfriend?
Your Summer Love Style is Serious
While others may be into a summer fling, you're about the real thing.
And there's a good chance you're already serious with someone already.
For you, the summer is about getting closer and more committed.
Just don't get tempted by any of that hot weather eye candy!
What's Your Summer Love Style?
You Are Mostly Secure
In general, you feel confident and together.
But the wrong thing can happen, and all of a sudden, you're not feeling so secure.
Luckily, your insecurities don't last long... at least, not usually.
So the next time you're feeling insecure, try to snap out of it - and remember the confident woman you are!
Are You An Insecure Girl?
Your Relationship is Still Building Strength
You're relationship is fairly strong, but you're still working on making things solid.
Make sure you're both treating each other with kindness and respect, even when things aren't going well.
How Strong Is Your Relationship With Your Guy?
Your Life is 80% Perfect
Your life is pretty darn perfect. You don't have much to complain about.
Of course, your life is occasionally less than perfect. But you're usually too happy to notice.
How Perfect is Your Life?
You Are Picky When it Counts
Like most sane women, you want a great guy who will treat you well.
But you're also willing to put up with a few flaws in your Mr. Right
You should congratulate yourself on having a realistic approach to dating.
You probably have quite a few great guys you can date!
Are You Too Picky When It Comes To Men?
You Were a Rabbit
You are fast thinking and tend to live by your wits.
Getting over fears is important to you, as is strengthening intuition.
What Animal Were You In a Past Life?
You're a Total Maneater
Almost every guy that crosses your path ends up a little worse for the wear.
You see men as your playthings - and your motto is "So many men, so little time."
And while you're having fun, everyone is a little scared of you.
Your girlfriends are leery of your maneating ways. And most men find you downright freaky.
Are You a Maneater?
Guys Think You're Easy to Be With... But Not Easy
You're definitely a flirt - and a good one.
But you also know that you shouldn't make a move on any cute guy who passes by.
You save your seductive moves for someone who already knows the real you.
That way, your sex appeal is just part of the whole package.
Are You An Easy Girl?
How You Are In Love
You take a while to fall in love with someone. Trust takes time.

You give and take equally in relationships.

You tend to get very attached when you're with someone. You want to see your love all the time.

You love your partner unconditionally and don't try to make them change.

You stay in love for a long time, even if you aren't loved back. When you fall, you fall hard.
How Are You In Love?
You Should Date A Japanese Guy!
You're an interesting blend of traditonal and modern
And a Japanese guy is likely to be on your wavelength
Maybe you'll show your love by dying your hair the same color
Or get married in a traditional white kimono!
Which Foreign Guy Should You Date?
You Are Most Like Laetitia Casta
Curvy, beautiful, and wild
Which Victoria's Secret Angel Are You?
He's Going to Ask You... And Soon!
As far as a proposal goes, all signs point to YES!
All you've got to do is stay calm and wait him out.
If you want to start dreaming about your dress and ceremony...
Well, that's cool - as long as you keep it on the down low
That means all bridal magazines go under the bed!
Is He About To Propose?
He Loves You For Your Body - and For You!
You're guy is really into your bod.
But he's also all about what's on the inside too.
While your guy make take his admiration a bit too far...
Just remember that he truly loves you.
Does He Only Love You For Your Body?
You Are a Kogyaru!
If it's cute, you'll wear it. Fake and bake, hair bleach, and bright makeup line your bathroom cabinet.
As for clothes - anything that's short and cute ("kawaii!").
You are the prize object of all sorts of men - but you are really looking for a rich foreign guy.
He'll find you out hanging out in Shibuya shopping at the 109, text messaging and sending photos over your cellphone.
What's Your Japanese Subculture?
You Are a Good Student of Men
You're pretty good at knowing what men are thinking
But you're not dead on 100% of the time
Let your guy off the hook sometimes... because you may be reading him all wrong!
How Well Do You Understand Men?
You Are a Rainbow
Breathtaking and rare
You are totally enchanting and intriguing
But you usually don't stick around long!

You are best known for: your beauty

Your dominant state: seducing
What Type of Weather Are You?
It's 80% Love and 20% Lust
You and your guy are truly in love, even if that spark seems to be a little dimmer.
Are Your Feelings For Him Lust or Love?
He's Absolutely Committed to You!
Your guy is committed to you, as if you were already married
And hopefully, you show the same commitment to him
While you may have had your ups and downs, you've smoothed things out
If the two of you aren't serious, you will be soon
So start secretly planning your wedding
It may happen sooner than you think!
Will He Commit?
He's a Keeper!
Your guy is a rare find: sweet, kind, and loyal.
And as long as he doesn't have three nippples,
You should seriously consider keeping him a long time

Sometimes a girl can't see a good thing when she's got one
So let me tell you: your guy is a gold medal boyfriend
Just make sure you treat him right in return!
Is He a Keeper?
You Are 56% Pure
You're usually the typical girl or guy next door...
But you also have a secret naughty side!
How Pure Are You?
You Are a String Bikini
You're confident, bold, and sexy.
No one has to tell you - you know you look damn good!
What Kind of Bikini Are You?
You Are 75% Sexy
Your Sex Appeal Is: Extremely High

You're very sexy. You just have that certain something that takes over a room.
You know how to attract, entice, and keep whoever you want. You are truly appealing.
How Much Sex Appeal Do You Have?
You Follow Your Heart
You're romantic, sentimental, and emotional.
You tend to fall in (and out of) love very quickly.
Some may call you fickle, but you can't help where your emotions take you.
You've definitely broken a few hearts, but you're not a heartbreaker by nature.
Your intentions are always good, even if they change with the wind
Do You Follow Your Head or Your Heart?
You Are 32% Shy
You are slightly shy, but overall, your reactions to social situations are normal.
You dread difficult social situations, but you still handle them with grace.
How Shy Are You?
You Are An Attention Seeker
You're only human, so you can't help but want a little attention every now and then.
You love the spotlight, but only when it's well deserved. You'd hate to be known for the wrong thing.
And you also don't mind sharing the spotlight. You can easily give someone else credit or a complement.
You know there's enough attention to go around, and it makes you happy when your friends shine.

You come across as: Friendly and interesting

People may wrongly think you're: A little more modest than you actually are!
Are You An Attention Whore?
For the twelve days of Christmas, your true love will send you:
Twelve street musicians drumming
Eleven christmas trees a-twinkling
Ten gymnasts a-leaping
Nine ladies knitting
Eight cows a-milking
Seven gingerbread men a-crumbling
Six puppies a-barking
Five golden bowls of chicken noodle soup
Four calling booty calls
Three French tourists
Two diamond pinky rings
And a fairy in a olive tree
What Will You Get for the 12 Days of Christmas?
What Your Face Says
At first glance, people see you as confident and determined.

Overall, your true self is reserved and logical.

With friends, you seem dramatic, lively, and quick to react.

In love, you seem intelligent and a bit intimidating.

In stressful situations, you seem selfish and moody.
What Do People Think Of Your Face?
Your Aura is Red
You have a high level of emotion. This can mean passion, but it can also mean rage.
Usually, you don't take these emotions out on others. You just use them as motivation - and it works!

The purpose of your life: embracing all the wonders of the life, lots of travels, and tons of adventures

Famous reds include: Madonna, Marilyn Monroe, Jennifer Lopez

Careers for you to try: Dancer, Boxer, Surgeon
What Color Is Your Aura?
You Are Apple Red
You're never one to take life too seriously, and because of it, you're a ton of fun.
And although you have a great sense of humor, you are never superficial.
Deep and caring, you do like to get to the core of people - to understand them well.
However, any probing you do is light hearted and fun, sometimes causing people to misjudge you.
What Color Red Are You?
You Are Cameo
You are understanding and very empathetic.
You don't tend to have acquaintances. Everyone is your friend.
And all of your friends tend to be friends. You have a knack for bringing very different people together.
What Color Orange Are You?
You Are Emerald Green
Deep and mysterious, it often seems like no one truly gets you.
Inside, you are very emotional and moody - though you don't let it show.
People usually have a strong reaction to you... profound love or deep hate.
But you can even get those who hate you to come around. There's something naturally harmonious about you.
What Color Green Are You?
You are Ocean Blue
You're both warm and practical. You're very driven, but you're also very well rounded.
You tend to see both sides to every issue, and people consider you a natural diplomat.
What Color Blue Are You?
You Are Iris
You are an interesting blend of fun and wisdom.
You definitely make people think about themselves and their place in the world.
But they'll have fun doing it. You definitely epitomize laughter therapy.
You are a very enriching and entertaining friend!
What Color Purple Are You?
You Are A Maple Tree
There's not anyone in this world quite like you.
You are full of imagination, ambition, and originality.
Shy but confident, you hunger for new experiences.
You have a good memory and learn easily.
You are sometimes nervous and always complex (especially in love).
What's Your Celtic Horoscope?
You Are the Ace of Hearts
Youthful and playful, you love life and the world.
You have a kind spirit, and you bring happiness to everyone you know.

Artistic and bold, you see the world in bright colors.
And you certainly aren't afraid to express everything you see and feel.

You are sentimental, and your emotions are very deep.
You are easily swept away and easily hurt.

A gamble you should take: Blackjack

Your friends would describe you as: Unique

Your enemies would describe you as: Weepy

If you lived in Vegas, you would be: An up and coming chef or fashion designer
What Playing Card Are You?
You Are Fall Flowers
Beautiful yet often forgotten.
What Part of Fall Are You?
You Are Somewhat Sexy
While you may not be the sexiest person in the world, you have your sexy moments.
You sometimes carry yourself well, and it gets you a lot of attention.

You have a lot of sex appeal ... as long as you remain confident, friendly, and adventurous.
The only times you seem unsexy are when you lose your confidence or sense of adventure.

How You Are Sexy

Your modern look is sexy. You don't give people too much of the same old thing. You like to change it up.

You are secure in social situations, and you definitely have a confident vibe. And that's very sexy.

How You Aren't Sexy

Your underwear is not sexy, and you may be feeling a little unsexy because of it. Why not spice things up under your clothes?

You don't always present yourself in the best light when you're annoyed and frustrated. While this isn't the biggest turn off, you never know who's watching!
Are You Sexy?
Your Kissing Purity Score: 60% Pure
For you, kissing isn't a casual thing

Lip to lip action makes your heart sing
Kissing Purity Test
You Are Friends With Potential
There's a little spark going on here, no question about it
Will this develop into a hot romance? Look to your guy friend for clues.
Does he flirt with all his female friends? Or are you an exception?
If he's giving you special treatment, you've won a part of his heart already.
Is He More Than a Friend?
Your Envy Quotient: 54%
You are an envious person, but only at times.
Perhaps certain situations trigger your envy. Or maybe you're especially jealous when you're feeling insecure.
Instead of letting that green monster out, work on making your own life better.
And then maybe people will be envious of you.
How Much Envy Do You Have?
You Are Fairly Normal in Love
When it comes to love, you have fairly normal ideas and expectations.
Your relationships and ideas may be a bit quirky at times...
But you see love the same way as most people do.

Why You Are Normal in Love

You are normal because you had your first boyfriend or girlfriend before you were 15.

You are normal because you haven't been in love with two people at once.

Why You Aren't Normal in Love

You are abnormal because you don't believe a long distance relationship can work.

You are abnormal because you believe people only have one soulmate.
Are You Normal in Love?
You Are a Winter Person
You are calm, serious, and focused.
You're the type of person who appreciates the quiet and calm.

Winter is the perfect time for you to get cozy and work on a hobby.
Summer is a bit too hectic for you. You like the dead of winter... preferably with a roaring fire inside.
Are You a Winter Person or a Summer Person?
What the Beach Test Says About You
You like people, but you're careful about who you get close to. Friendship is important to you... so important that you aren't just friends with anyone.

You fall in love with ease and confidence. Even if you've had bad experiences in the past, each new love is a reason to start completely over.

You are deeply passionate about several things in your life. You're not passionate about much... and the few passions you have are truly obsessions.

Your sense of humor is sarcastic, snarky, and realistic. You're not exactly happy-go-lucky.
The Beach Test
You Are a Sweet Person
When it comes to snacks, you're more likely to grab some candy than heat up a pizza.

There's a good chance you're female (women prefer sweet snacks)...
Or at least, you prefer to be in the company of women.

Your tastes are simple and predictable. You are young at heart.
You tend to crave food you can just grab and eat.
Are You Sweet or Salty?
You Are Midtown
You love so many things, you don't fit into any one label.
Your city girl persona goes to a fancy restaurant one night and a dive bar the next.
Are You An Uptown Girl or Downtown Girl?
You Belong in Generation Y
You fit in best with people born between 1982 and 2001.
You are cooperative, flexible, and adaptable.
You know the world changes quickly, and you're eager to change with it.
You are socially responsible, forward thinking, and open minded.
What Generation Do You Belong In?
Your Rising Sign is Virgo
Well put-together and elegant, you sometimes seem standoffish.
And truth be told, sometimes you do feel superior to those around you.

A bit shy and introverted, you tend to stay quiet - even if you're feeling social.
At parties, you can seem like you're very serious while you're having fun.

You clever and ingenious, with an alert and active mind.
Good at facts and figures, you excel at logical and mathematical tasks.
What's Your Rising Sign?
You Are a Strawberry
You are friendly, outgoing, and well liked by many people.
You are popular, but there's nothing you ordinary or average about you.

You a very interesting person, and you have many facets to your personality.
Sometimes you feel very conflicted. Your different sides of your personality pull at you.

You are a very sensual and passionate person. You are fiery... you can't help it.
In general, you keep your passionate side under wraps. You are only wild in private.
What Type of Fruit Are You?
What Your Feet Say About You:
You are pretty average in your expressiveness. You can express yourself well, but you don't always want to.

You are a somewhat passionate person. A few things get you very fired up, but you're usually pretty laid back.

You are an assertive person at times. You'll pull out all the stops to get what you want, if it's worth it.

You take a while to fall in love, but once you do, you stay pretty attached to your partner.

You are not easily frightened, but you have a few strong phobias.

You are very practical and down to earth. You're more concerned with action than thoughts.

You are very spoiled. You don't work unless you have to, and you love to be waited on.

You are easily influenced by other people. You're quite impressionable, so you should only be around people who are a good influence.
What Do Your Feet Say About You?
You Are Most Like Charlotte!
You are the ultimate romantic idealist
You've been hurt before, but that hasn't caused you to give up on love.
If anything, your resolve to fall in love is stronger than ever.
And it's this feminine optimism that men find most appealing about you.


Romantic prediction: That guy you are seeing (or crushing on)?

Could be very serious - if you play your cards right!
Which Sex and the City Vixen Are You?
Your Sensitivity Score: 83%
You are an extremely sensitive person. You notice everything.
You've probably been called overly sensitive before, and it's partially true.
Highly sensitive people tend to be highly intelligent. And you just can't turn off that part of you.
Are You Extremely Sensitive?
What These Roses Say About You
You are a classic romantic who believes in true love.
You often experience deep emotions and feel warmth toward almost everyone.
You are a bundle of positive feelings and sweetness.
What Do The Flowers You Pick Say About You?
You Are A Little Scared of Commitment
You're open to getting serious with someone... though you can't entirely imagine it.
Maybe you haven't met the right person. Maybe you haven't gotten to the right point in your life.

Your reaction to commitment is very normal - especially if you're young or have been burned before.
Give it time. You'll probably be ready for a serious relationship sooner than you think.
Are You Afraid of Commitment?
You Would Choose Love
Money may buy a little happiness, but not the happiness of true love.
You rather have a true soulmate than a private jet.
And while many people may claim they would choose love too...
You're one of the few who would really do it.
Would You Choose Love or Money?
Your Passion is Red!
You've got that spark - a good dose of intensity, power, and determination.
You do whatever you want in life ... to hell with what anyone thinks!
With so many interests and loves, you're always running around doing something new.
You have fire in your eyes, and it shows. Bet you're even wearing something red!
What Type of Passionate Woman Are You?
You Are Valentine's Day
You are a true romantic who places the ultimate importance on love.
You are warm hearted, and you find it easy to care for people.
Love is what drives you - and you have a love to give.
You enjoy making someone's day. You're full of surprises.

What makes you celebrate: Being with the person you love on a special day

At holiday get togethers, you do best as: The sentimental one

On a holiday, you're the one most likely to: See it as romantic and special
What Holiday Are You?
You Are a Maze
You can be confusing, tiring, and deceptive. But at the end of it all, you're sweet.
You believe there are many ways to get to an answer...
And you are willing to explore every single one of them!
What Kind of Puzzle Are You?
You Are a Red Crayon
Your world is colored with bright, vivid, wild colors.
You have a deep, complex personality - and you are always expressing something about yourself.
Bold and dominant, you are a natural leader. You have an energy that is intense... and sometimes overwhelming.
Your reaction to everything tends to be strong. You are the master of love-hate relationships.

Your color wheel opposite is green. Green people are way too mellow to understand what drives your energy.
What Color Crayon Are You?
You are Slinky Heels!
You're an uptown, well put together woman
But you're not too uptight to enjoy a hot club
You're always the best dressed chick in the room
And you'll only settle for the best in men
What Kind Of Women's Shoe Are You?
You Are a Thong
You are daring and outrageous.
You love attention in almost any form, and you'll do a lot to get noticed.

You are proud of your body. You work hard to look good.
Swimsuit season is your favorite time of the year. It gives you a chance to show off your assets!
What Kind of Swimsuit Are You?
You Are 65% Normal About Sex
When it comes to sex, you're somewhat normal.
You tend to have an average sex life... which is no where as boring as it sounds!

No one would probably consider your sexual experiences or preferences to be really unusual.
But you probably do have a few interesting surprises up your sleeve.
Are You Normal About Sex?
You Are Sexually Powerful
Your attitude toward sex is healthy, safe, and sane.
You enjoy sex as much as (or possibly even more than) the average person.

You're open minded, intelligent, and adventurous when exploring your sexuality.
And while you never take things too far, you take them far enough!
Are You Sexually Powerful?
Your Physical Flirt Level: 80%
You are a major physical flirt. You definitely can't keep your hands to yourself!
Whether you're playing footsie or giving a lingering hug, you're known for touching.

And while some people may welcome this flirting style, not everyone likes it.
Don't stop touching people, but make sure your advances are appropriate and welcomed.
Are You a Physical Flirt?
You Would Be a Good Spouse 70% of the Time
You have what it takes to be an amazing wife or husband.
You are caring, patient, giving, and romantic. You are willing to work for a marriage.

More than anything, you're not about to let your ego ruin a relationship.
You are humble and unselfish. And that's the key to being a good spouse.
Would You Be a Good Wife or Husband?
Your Hair Should Be Blonde
You are outgoing, light hearted, and a ton of fun.
You don't take life too seriously, and you do your best to charm everyone you meet.

You are very energetic. People tend to underestimate you, but you can get a lot done.
You do tend to be a bit sensitive. If someone has a bad opinion of you, it truly hurts.

You are cunning and clever. You are smart, but you aren't “book smart” or academic.
Some people may think you're superficial, but they're not seeing the whole picture.
What Color Hair Should You Have?
What Your Cute Monster Says About You
You are a simply happy person. You still view the world with a childlike innocence.
You have an easy going attitude, and you value harmony. You love freely and inspire others to love.

You inner demon is frailty. You are easily beaten down by life.
People think you're cute because you are optimistic. Your outlook on life is charming.
The Cute Monster Test
You Are a Lace Bra!
Dreamy, romantic, and ultra-feminine
You're a womanly woman who makes guys feel like men
Your perfect guy is strong, determined, and handsome
With a softer side that only you can draw out
What Kind of Bra Are You?
What Your Bed Says About You
Outward appearances are very important to you. You do your best to look good and have an attractive home.

You are an organized and disciplined person. You do the right thing because you want to, not because people expect you to.

You are very low maintenance. You tend to go with the flow, and you're easily pleased.

In relationships, you tend to kick back and let the other person be in charge.

You tend to be a dreamy, head in the clouds type of person. You think in terms of possibilities.

You are a bit of a homebody, but you can also make yourself at home anywhere.
What Does Your Bed Say About You?
You Are a Cherry Muffin
You are very friendly and sweet. You love to socialize.
You have a bit of a fire in your heart, and you secretly love adventure.

You are well known for speaking your mind. You tell people exactly what you think.
However, you're so nice when you're honest, no one really cares!

Even though you're down to earth, you're not exactly the girl or guy next door.
You are actually quite worldly and sophisticated. You are well traveled and well read.
What Kind of Muffin Are You?
You Look Like an Aries
It's likely that you have a lean and strong body.
Your facial features are uniquely beautiful, and you may have a scar or beauty mark.

You have good posture, and you carry yourself with an air of confidence.
You have a strong, steady gaze. You eyes are often issuing a challenge.

Like most Aries people, you probably very energetic and enjoy it when someone challenges you.
You expect the best from people, and you believe in them. You are willing to take a risk on someone.
What Sign Do You Look Like?
Your Snow Test Says You're Independent
You feel like something good will happen to you in the next few weeks.

You have an amazingly strong work ethic. You are likely to be very successful in life.

You are an independent, individualistic person. You thrive when you're doing your own thing.

Your biggest worry in your life is your health. You tend to be a bit of a hypochondriac.

When it comes time to relax, you have difficulty relaxing. You are a bit high strung.
The Snow Test
Your Sensuality Score is: 60%
You are quite sensual, but you don't go overboard.
You can appreciate a good piece of music (or pie) better than most people.

While you love to treat your senses, you're not greedy.
You enjoy any sensual experience that comes your way, but you are not a slave to your senses.
How Sensual Are You?
What Your Taste in Chocolate Says About You
You are unique, creative, and fascinating.
You don't do what's expected of you.
You go for what's unknown and uncharted.

You are full of life and vigor.
You have an amazing amount energy, and you keep very active.
Some people feel like you can't focus on them. You do tend to be restless

You love to be in love. You crave romance, whether you're single or not.
You feel lost when you don't feel passion... you need someone to adore.
The Chocolate Oracle
Your Chocolate Easter Bunny Personality
You know what you want in life and how to get it.
You're not going to waste time or let yourself be meek

Whether it's chocolate, money, or power...
You take what you can get, and you act quickly.

You have a lot of energy, and people sometimes scared by your determination.
Not that you care what other people think. You're not going to apologize for who you are.
The Easter Bunny Quiz
Your Inner Eye Color Is Blue
You've got the personality of a blue eyed women
You're intense and expressive - and always on the go
You've also got a sweet, playful side - which draws men in
What Color Eyed Woman Are You Really?
You Will Sleep With 8 People
Better get cracking!
How Many People Will You Sleep With?
You Are 55% Kissable
You are quite kissable, and you probably get kissed often.
You're not as kissable as you could be though. There's a little room for improvement.

Be prepared for a kiss at all times, even if it means carrying a toothbrush or mints with you.
And when the time comes to kiss, stay open and calm. Being nervous only makes you less kissable.
How Kissable Are You?
You Are Low Key and Relaxed
You are a dynamic, vibrant person. You aren't afraid to pursue your passions.

When you are happiest, you are calm. You appreciate tradition and family. You enjoy feeling cozy.

You embrace change. You love change. You see change as a rebirth.

You find hard work to be the most comforting thing in the world. You like the feeling of accomplishing something.

Your ideal day is spontaneous and surprising. You like to play things by ear, and you always end up doing something interesting.

You are very impatient. You spend more time waiting for something than actually enjoying it.
The Autumn Test
Your Friendship Style is Empathetic
You deeply care about each person you're friends with. For you, friendship is all about the personal connection.
You tend to know everything about your friends' lives... and they know everything about yours. Your friends are your confidants.

You are always there for your friends. You celebrate their successes and support them in their times of need.
You are as loyal as they come. And you expect the same loyalty and understanding from your friends in return.

You and another Empathetic Friend: Have a amazing friendship, when it works. You care for each other deeply, but you often end up with hurt feelings and drama.

You and a Gregarious Friend: May have a bit of a one sided friendship. You adore your Social Friend, but you sometimes feel a bit neglected.

You and an Independent Friend: Struggle a bit. You are very interested in your Independent Friend's life, but your friend often needs more space.

You and a Philosophical Friend: Respect one another. You love to learn about your Philosophical Friend's brilliant ideas.
What's Your Friendship Style?
You Are Somewhat Approachable
You are a fairly friendly person, and you're definitely not scaring people away.
You do tend to have your guard up strangers, and rightfully so.

How approachable you are depends on who is trying to approach you.
You're friendly to people who seem harmless and nice. But you also know how to give creepy people the cold shoulder!
Are You Approachable?
You Should Follow Christianity
You believe in the Holy Trinity, and that Jesus walked the earth as the son of God.
You also believe that all people sin and that God will forgive you for your sins.

Your relationship with God is very important to you.
You strengthen your faith through prayer, worship, and Bible study.
What Religion Should You Be?
You Are a Friendly Ex
While the guys you've dated haven't been perfect, you've kept most as friends
In fact, one or two of your exes may be your best friends - after all, they know you best
And though your mature attitude is awesome, make sure nothing gets too weird
Or else you could lose these friendships, simply because your exes' new women think you're *too* friendly
What Kind of Ex-Girlfriend Are You?
0
You Are An Understanding Girlfriend!
You care about your guy, so much that you tend to put him first
And while this makes your relationship smooth, sometimes you let big things slide
Still be your understanding self, but if something really bothers you - let your guy know
He'll still want you, even if you occasionally disagree
What Kind of Girlfriend Are You?
You Are the Daughter
You very keyed in to emotions. You care deeply and are quick to forgive others.
You often get lost in your own thoughts and daydreams. You find it difficult to stay focused.

At your best, you are sweet, sensitive, and innocent. You bring joy to people's lives.
You are open and expressive. You love sharing your optimistic, dreamy vision of the world.

At your worst, you feel powerless and like a victim. Your fear can paralyze you.
You tend to complain and whine. Whether your complaints are legitimate or not, you're not one to solve your own problems.
What Family Role Do You Play?
You Are Cute-Sexy!
You are definitely attractive, and you have an interesting mix of sexiness and cuteness.
You are both hot and quirky. Gorgeous and silly. Charming and natural.

You are not so in-your-face sexy that you're unapproachable. You tone things down a bit.
More than anything else, you are real and genuine. And that makes you truly captivating.
Are You Cute or Sexy?
You Are Very Warm
You are kind, caring, and empathetic. A lot of warm energy radiates from you.
And it's not an act - you truly like people. You get a charge from people being around you.

You are are easy going and very socially adaptable. You're willing to overlook peoples'quirks.
You enjoy meeting people from all walks of life and helping them if you can. Giving makes you feel good.
How Warm Are You?
Your Height Says You're Kind
You are a gifted communicator, and you understand other people well.
You are compassionate and empathetic. You feel other's pain a little too easily.

Because of your open heart and open mind, many people admire and adore you.
You are classy and well mannered. You have the art of charm mastered.

You are about as tall as the average Mexican woman.
What Does Your Height Say About You?
You Have Your Priorities in Order
For you, sex is usually your number one priority.

You don't mind having things to get done... as long as they don't pile up on you.

You attend to almost every priority in your life. You don't neglect much.

You want your closest relationships to be a high priority, but you often don't get around to them.
The Priority Test
Your Colors Say You Are Quirky
When you are at peace, you are:

Thoughtful and sensitive

When you are moved to act, you are:

Unorthodox and idealistic

When you are inspired, you are:

Spontaneous and adventurous

When your life is perfectly balanced, you are:

Connected to nature and the world

Your life's purpose is:

To reach enlightenment
The Ultimate Color Test
You Are Vanilla
You are a delightful, friendly person. You are optimistic about life and people.
You are enthusiastic and energetic. You enjoy everything you do.

You are cooperative and flexible. You get along with people from many walks of life.
You're not a show off. Instead, you're more likely to help other people shine.
Are You Chocolate or Vanilla?
You Are Affectionate
Your life is full of love and friendship - and you always have more to give.
You have an open heart. You are willing to take that leap and put your faith in people.

You see the good in everyone and everything. You are a very sympathetic person.
The people you love make you very happy. You feel warmly toward those around you.
What Kind of Happy Are You?
You Are Orange Juice
You are an energetic, driven, motivated person.
You are always eager to get started, and you face each day with optimism.

You are bright and hopeful. You tend to see what's right as opposed to what's wrong.
You are generous and caring. You're always happy to give someone else a little energy boost!
What Kind of Juice Are You?
You are the Sense of Touch
You are a highly sensitive and easily moved person.
You love to get as close to other people as possible.
Human connection is very important to you.

You are also likely to be an animal lover who loves animals as much as humans.
In fact, you like almost anything soft!
You have expensive taste in clothes and furniture. It's all about the fabric.
Which of the Five Senses Are You?
You Are Dare
You are outrageous, adventurous, and wild. You live to have fun.
You are all about taking risks and pushing limits. You love the rush of doing something forbidden.

Like most daring people, you are highly intelligent and creative. That's why you get bored so easily.
You need a lot of stimulation and novelty in your life. You aren't satisfied with the mundane.
Are You Truth or Dare?
You Are a Red Velvet Cupcake
You are sensual and self-indulgent. If it feels good, you'll do it.
You're drawn to gorgeous, sexy people. You can't help it if you want your friends to be attractive!

You are like a cupcake because you are completely decadent and over the top.
You believe life is too short to deprive yourself. You rather overdo it than go without.
What Flavor Cupcake Are You?
You Are the Communicator
You are a collector and facilitator of knowledge. You love storytelling and teaching.
You light up when you're around other people, and you especially light up in front of a crowd.

You are a charismatic person who's genuinely a joy to be with. You remind others to have fun.
You love life, and you're wake up grateful for every new day. This attitude makes the people around you love life as well.
What's Your Life's Mission?
You Are the Heart Chakra
You are loving, kind, and empathetic. You feel for the world, and you truly value peace.
You have many close relationships, and you work hard to make them harmonious.

You are accepting and understanding. You are tolerant of all sorts of viewpoints, even if you don't agree with them.
You are very forgiving. When you love someone, your love is unconditional.
What Chakra Are You?
You Are a Pond
You are modest, pleasant, and reliable. You are content and confident.
You are harmonious and caring. You truly like other people for who they are.

You are a very genuine, humble person. Because of this, you're very approachable.
You are soft-spoken and a bit sensitive. Your mild personality is a refreshing change for people.
What Body of Water Are You?
You Are Influential and Ambitious
When You Are Comfortable:

You are a glamorous, social person. You love being the center of attention and an object of adoration.
People see you as charming and charismatic. You are naturally dazzling. You are ambitious, and find it easy to get ahead in life.

When You Are At Your Best:

You are very unique and talented. You solve problems well, and you have a creative approach to life.
People see you as straightforward and level headed. You can see opportunities when others only see troubles.

When You Are in a Social Setting:

You are a very sensual person. You love indulging your senses, and you seek out both novelty and comfort.
People see you as stimulating and riveting. You have many ideas to convey, and you're good at teaching people.
What Do Your Initials Say About You?
You Should Light a Cinnamon Candle
You are affectionate yet mischievous. You have a warm, welcoming spirit - but you also like to spice things up.
You love hosting parties and events at your home. You love to live it up with your friends.

You're the type of person who is open hearted and accepting... as long as someone is willing to deal with your quirks.
You are both comforting and stimulating. You thrive in both familiar and exotic environments.
What Scent Candle Should You Light?
You Are Spirit
You are resilient, hopeful, and inspiring. You have a lot of emotional, physical, and mental energy.
You nurture and nourish yourself. You know that you need fulfillment and downtime if you want to be your best.

You stay present in every moment. You don't allow yourself to be distracted or flustered.
You appreciate the life you have been given. You embrace all that is beautiful in the world.
Are You Mind, Body, or Spirit?
You Are Going to Heaven
You're so saintly you're practically an angel, and there's no other place for you than heaven.
You are always concerned with doing the right thing. You consider being a good person a joy... not a burden.

You're not perfect, and you don't expect anyone else to be. You are ethical without being sanctimonious about it.
You are happy with yourself and the decisions you've made. And that's what's important.
Are You Going to Heaven or Hell?
You Are Chirping Birds
You are a very caring person. You especially feel for innocent beings, like animals and children.
You are keyed in to the world and very peaceful. You believe that everyone is connected.

You remain focused and in the moment. You are not easily distracted.
You have a good memory, especially for things that you hear. You listen carefully.
What Part of Spring Are You?
You Are High Heeled Boots
You are incredibly sexy. There's no way you could hide it, so you just flaunt it.
You are a naturally talented flirt. You make everyone feel fascinating and attractive.

You have a wild streak. You like to have fun, and your idea of fun is pretty outrageous.
You dare to be yourself and life courageously. People respect you for it.
What Kind of Boots Are You?
You Are an Acai Berry
You are an intense, fascinating person with a very strong personality.
You don't shy away from controversy, and you're incredibly independent.

You are cultured, knowledgeable, and worldly. You have a deep understanding of things.
You are lively and healthy. You believe your body is a temple, and you treat it as such.
What Tropical Fruit Are You?
You Color Your Life With Vibrant Warmth
You are light hearted and have a sunny disposition. You live a life of gratitude.
You are open and adventurous. You're interested in young people and what's new in the world.

You don't carry any emotional baggage with you through life. What's done is done, and you've moved on.
You start every day fresh. You are optimistic about what's to come.
How Do You Color Your Life?
Blogthings: Free Quizzes for Everyone
The Way Out =)
websites
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*ideal blogskins 4 you
*music 4 websites
*fun stuff 4 blogs

Myself <3
*my intimate blog <3
*my twitter <3

Beloved
* Alice aka my bitch
*Fabian
*josefyne
*edmund chua
*andy
*n246
*jun quan
*ShuLing aka Angel
*HaiTang aka Jermaine
*Samantha
*PeggieFaith
*Michelle
*germaine
*Kimberly jie
*Hak Soon
*Calvin
*Joshua
*Bengamin
*zhe loon
*vincent
*He shen
*George
*Jowee
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Yours-Tragically
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Monday, November 9, 2009 11:14 AM
haiz... Im alone at the library using com cause chou hong is still having lesson...
haha... heard from him that he just gotten his mini lappy , sounded very happy... but today he took so long to reply all my sms from 9.30am onwards... Think he get lappy forget about me liaoz... =.=

I HATE THE SCHOOL'S SUPER SLOW INTERNET !!!
~!@#$%^&*~!@#$%^&*~!@#$%^&*~!@#$%^&*~!@#$%^&*

Haha... yesterday was totally enjoyable day with chou hong again =)
First Bernard and Kelvin accompany to do my hp thingy... our intial plan is take bus 88 to Pasir Ris then change mrt to Simei but due to i leave my house late so we can't make to simei by 5pm... so we decided tom stay Pasir Ris area...

sms chou hong that I'm not meeting my mummie any more so we can carry our actual plan today... when chou hong heard that Im at pasir ris, he ma jiang like very happy sia... tell him that i will rush down to tampines to meet him but he insisted to come pasir ris cause can eat seoul garden at E!hub what ...

while wanting for him , we all went to play arcade sia... playing around 6.30pm then we go buy bread and buddle tea and sit down at some where while wait for chpu hong to come... then Bernard and kelvin leave when chou hong come... we walk all the way to E!hub... so paiseh sia... due to I never bring enough money so chou hong decided to treat me lor... I feel very bad le...

we have fun eating at seoul garden... after that we went to tampines , cause one of his friends's last day working... we went to arcade to play maximum tune [he play, not I play]... dump imto wesley emo... stay there chit chat awhile before chou hong send me to my bus stop... reach home liaoz , chat abit on phone before i sleep =)
Friday, November 6, 2009 10:23 PM
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUMMIE =)

FINALLY my family are back from Taiwan, they has bought quite alot of thing for me sia =)

Today meet chou hong after school at the admin block loddy and walk to expo there to take bus 12 to down town east and walked to Coast Sand Pasir ris... walked half way there , it started raining cat and dog... we run to the chalet but too bad no one there so we just sit outside the chalet door chit chat and waiting for Qirong to come open the door for us...

When Qirong arrive at the chalet , we walked to down east BK help him buy lunch as he helped us set up BBQ pit... walked to cheers as well to buy our "lunch"... so sweet that chou hong BBQ things for me to eat... muahahaha =)

after getting our stomach full , we went to lay on the bed and rest with Qirong also... I love it when chou hong hug me to sleep even when his friends around... feel so loved... around 3.30pm , all his friends went to E!hub to play pool so only leave the two of us there continue sleeping... the way chou hong sleeps is so cute, make me can't help but keep disturbing him... >.<

Around 4.30pm we went to e!hub to return the chalet keys to Qirong then he goes to work while I going home to rest...

Haha ... looking forward to eat Seoul Garden with chou hong on sunday... woohoo... <3
For those who don't know , chou hong is my boyfriend, he even knows i still has some feelings toward my guardian angel and we are just trying to move on from our previous relationships... Indeed I feel so much happier and him too, but the memories with my guardian angel is always in my heart, I always remember them and never be replaced... =)
Thursday, November 5, 2009 11:10 PM
YOO HOO...I just reach home from cell group...
It was other great meeting and the games was SUPER fun sia ...
I love this game lor and hope to play it again >.<

anyway, chou hong didn't go cell group with me due to something happened...
Is okay cause there will be other chance... God is moving his life sia and he grow stronger each day... =)

boy... I know you are anxious but it hurt me so much to see you push my hand away when i just wanna cheer you up... thank god that everything is alright now... that scene which you push my hand keep rewinding in my mind even though you apologise... something is just hurts...
4:16 PM
Yawn ~ just wake from my afternoon nap...
Today Im end late for lesson again =.=
today good weather to sleep sia, whole day raining even till now...

attend classes until 12pm , waiting for chou hong to reach school then we went to eat at Cafe 1 with Jensen they all after that I went home and they go to their lessons...

later gonna meet chou hong again at Tampines and he is going to cell group with me tonight... praise the lord... I hope God will touch him tonight and meet him face to face... sensiously i sense that his spiritual is catching up with me even though manyau they all says im growing stronger and stronger, but he is growing rapidly sia...
now he can encourage me when Im down with bible verse even though he is a 2 weeks old chiristian... He also understand that trails is test by faith blah blah... thank god for being true and close to him... i will live up to my responsibility to teach him more abt the supernatural... hmmm... i hope i get the chance to pray for him about tongues =)
Wednesday, November 4, 2009 11:18 AM
hey people...
Im blogging, now is 11.19am... some of you may wonder that why I'm blogging...
shouldn't I be in school ? Yes... I'm in school right now and instead if ending the lesson at usual timing but my banking and finance teacher dismiss us 1 hour earlier...my teacher give me KFC coupon and sms chou hong abt it and he get exicted to eat KFc during our break time... =)

waiting for chou hong again which is a pretty boring thingy...

Today is my school's school of business day and i will play the telematch later... =P
haha... hope get some fun later =)

hmmm...
yesterday after school , pei chou hong go pasir ris to settle his stuff after that we took mrt back to tampines to settle his other stuff.. now we spend quite some time in tampines to decided whether we will go parkway to eat ice flake or head down to Hougang to eat the western food which we has been wanting to eat... even when we are at the interchange , we still cant make up our minds... I came out with this idea that which ever bus came first then we will go where... then bus 72 came , so we headed back to Hougang...

when we arrive at Houngang , we went to the Houngang mall arcade to play... he played his maximum tune while I played my para para... after that , went to eat the western food and then at punggol park chit chat until 10pm then we walked back to my place...

hey, boy... Im really so happy to have you by my side. Everyday with you is just so enjoying... what makes me most happy is that you has accept God and I saw the changes in you... I just wanna says Jesus love you... continue to grow in the lord okay ? it makes me happy when I saw you becoming more and more open to me and trying to love people again each day... I believe that God will have his ways and you will find friends who will love and accept you for who you are...
Tuesday, November 3, 2009 3:22 PM
sorry people for not blogging for a period of time cause too much school work >.<
Right now Im waiting at the school's library for chou hong to dismiss... i seriously i hate the feeling of waiting for people... No choice cause his time table what =.=
and we will going to pasir ris there to settle stuff and parkway to eat our ice flake again... aftet that should be arcade ba...

November has FINALLY arrived and it means my birthday getting closer and closer =)
And my mum's birthday's 2 days time... on my God ,i haven even bought her any gift and my pocket is in a big hole =(

life has been good even project after project. God has shown me his way and I'm living in happiness... so much HAPPIER now, i just wanna thank God for everything that He has done in my life... =)

Jiayou to the all 'O' level-ers i know , you all half way there and just give your best shot... Is okay that you think you have screwed the paper but I believe that if you have done your best and God will do the rest... (to Janelle) May you be rewarded according to your hardwork =)
Dun worry God always reward you according the amount of effort you have put in and God never under rewarded =)
Saturday, October 31, 2009 9:42 AM
When i was surfing youtube. I realise that I haf forgetten this song...
It is still so nice... =)



Now is the time
When Heaven blends
With Earthly saints
The World resounds
As Angels sing
"Our God Reigns"

I give my all to you x2

From Heaven's throne
Your river flows to this land
And on this rock
Foundations lay
Here we stand
I give my all to you x2

Pouring out
This treasure you gave
In your promises, Our hearts turn brave
I will arise, and lay down this sacrifice
As we're building Your house on high

Your Kingdom come
Your will be done
On Earth as in Heaven...

Your Kingdom come
Your will be done
On Earth as in Heaven...
Friday, October 30, 2009 7:01 PM
YES!!! IN GOD'S HOUSE, I FOUND MY HOUSE =)


Coming to this place
Rejoicing hearts ablaze
How awesome is you throne , O God
Everlasting light , shinning in the night
A firm foundation strong in you
You gave us your kingdom keys
we're changed by your power and mercy
Living our destines so free
I have found home my home
I have found my purpose
In this sanctuary
Set on your great love
Living for your cause
Dream alive forever more
In your house , In your house
We find our home

Your city on a hill
The sick and wounded healed
In your presence,
Storms, "BE STILL"
Hear the heaven sound, your miracles abound
Now we stand on holy ground
You gave us your kingdom keys
we're changed by your power and mercy
Living our destines so free
I have found home my home
I have found my purpose
In this sanctuary
Set on your great love
Living for your cause
Dream alive forever more
In your house , In your house
We find our home

Your name forever will be great
All God's chidren celebrate
WOAH~
WOAH~
Your name forever will be great
All God's chidren celebrate
WOAH~
WOAH~
8:40 AM
INDEED GOD IS GRACEFUL !!!

God did something for me =)

Dear Heavenly Father
Thank for showing yourself so true to chou hong
I know You has greater mercy and grace for him...
You loves us with a love that no one can give
I will bless him in the name of jesus, he will be set free by your love
He will sense the prescene of tangible in the mighty of christ =)
The God is alive and now lives in him...
the whole heaven rejoicing for him !!!

I lift raymond into Your miracles working hand
I may not know him but You knows his ways...
I pray what is he going to go through , Your spirit will go before him
I pray that the works of the devil will has no way in his life
and have faith in your ways...
Dear Lord, I pray that you will bulid up his spirit-man as he pray and seek your face... even when he cant see Your ways ,he will trust Your heart...

Thanks God... for the great you have done =)
Sunday, October 25, 2009 11:49 PM


This is damn FUNNY and GAY...
SORRY Michelle,I knows you love this song... =.=
10:42 AM
Thanks Auntie Jasmine for your words once again...
Thanks for telling me that I don't need live in people's comments any more...
whether between Me and God , no one will knows...
What ever God said to me , I just hold on and have faith...

I went home and prays and ask for the answer
God speaks to me FINALLY...
He says, my precious one... I love you with a everlasting love... I knows it has been hard for you but I knows your ways and you shall not fear... The world's love will pass away but my love for you are faithful and true. BLAH BLAH is confidental liaoz... All i can says is God is guilding me... =P

suddenly I open my last week sermon notes, then it was reminded even Job does nothing wrong but God still allow Satan to test him... Job's 3 best friends says "you must have sinned against God, therefore repent..." but Job knows himself...
Then i have this revelation, those who judge by the spirit is wise. I don't need accord to any one because humans don't know our ways, only God and you knows...

God , if I have to take this path, I will trust in you... even God is gonna sly me, I will still trust you...

PS: I don't wanna fight with anyone... I will just trust what God has told me to do...let judge be upon me ,if im in wrong... Michelle, i knows you cares but I never asked you to talked to her... Nevermind, what done is done...
Thursday, October 22, 2009 8:27 AM
maybe like this is the best for Guardian Angel and me ba... I will try to move on cause we know is no use looking back or wandering,how it should be now or might have be on our relationship... I knows when you really say Good bye to me that moment, everyday has changed and you are no longer mine...

Just time round I really moving on ,you will alway be the one I know I'll never forget, and no matter where life brings me to , a part of me will always be with you... =)

To someone IMPORTANT:
Thanks for smiling for me... I'm so happy that Im part of the factor of your happiness... maybe now still can't totally smile for you , but i know one day I will... because of you, my heart has found a home... =)
Monday, October 19, 2009 1:08 AM
This is so cute... NEW version of 卖火柴小女孩...
FINALLY get 12 episode... last time when I 1st saw it , there's only 7 episode...
I enjoy part 10 the best...











Sunday, October 18, 2009 9:43 PM
17 october 2009 [saturday]
wake up at noon, then rush meet Janelle at her place...
Janelle's mother talked to me about my current situation
her words has encourage me to move go even further...
words of love set me free... =)
soon, Heshen came and join us at her place also...
together we set off to Tampines mall went to eat long jon sliver
soon michelle come join us also then we set off to service...
saw my guardian angel at the mrt there, we look at each other for around 10 sec and my heart goes ... ... ... then he smiled to me... Don't know which is good thing or bad thing... I abmit I still has feelings for him but now... sorry I cant say...
after service , all brothers went to mingfu's birthday and only leave sisters fellowshipping plus Heshen... =.=
Janelle, Heshen and me went to singapore post to makan makan... after that I took mrt to tampines meet chou hong after his work... we went to sunplaza park to slack and chit chat... then he send me off to take the last bus then he walked home from there... chat with chou hong on the phone before I go orh orh...
sorry, Janelle and Michelle that I make you all worry... at least Im alright so don't worry for me =)

18 october 2009 [Sunday]
suppose to went to yuhuan's workplace to pei her
in the end she sms-ed me no need to come down liaoz cause she is not working
then I went to Bugis and orchard shopping ALONE !!! seriously I really hate the feelings of shopping alone... Bought 2 little miss t-shirt for myself... Sunshine and Chatterbox =) then went home and sleep... wake up liaoz sms chat with Janelle and chou hong... daddy brought to eat at hong kong cafe... this is my day so far so ya...

To my guardian angel...
Will you worry what is about the guy next to me, did he make me cry... or says "Please don't look back and leave... Don't ever find you again and live... you should be happier this way... " ? I promise I will try to move on and only take the good memories with me...
Friday, October 16, 2009 10:29 PM
today went to sch with chou hong...
due to I never eat my breakfast so we went to cafe 2 eat but only I eat... =.=
after sch, He pei me go bishan ite just to return my F1 tee...
then we walked to Bishan junction 8 to eat subway
due to alot of people there so we took train back to Hougang to eat subway
after eating... we take bus 72 back to Tampines and we walked around Tampines 1 , Tampines mall and century square... after went to play arcade with his friend... =)
after that he go work then I go home... reach home eat and sleep again =P





PS: *super pissed with this girl... say what she wouldn't bother chou hong anymore then the VERY next second sms him ask how to go somewhere... what the FUCK...
~!@#$%^&*~!@#$%^&*~!@#$%^&*~!@#$%^&*~!@#$%^&*~!@#$%^&*~!@#$%^&*~!@#$%^&*
somemore the place is around is her school area ? don't tell me you don't know where to your school area ? somemore live in Tampines also... =.= might as well tell chou hong that you don't know your way home , ask him bring you home la... if you cant bear to leave him , then dun say you would not be bother... you know you like him la but he did promise he will woo you but huh you are not even his gf yet then why act like ma jiang he your bf ? whoever Iam to him is not your problem !!! i wonder why he
even bother to entertain you ?
Thursday, October 15, 2009 11:24 PM
just come back from cell group...
today nothing much has happened...
attend lesson till 11am then went to help ameer for his election...
half way this election , i went home due to not feeling well...
so did not went for afternoon lesson =(

rest at home before I went for cell group...
even till cell group i still not feeling well.

today is just like this... lolx...
Wednesday, October 14, 2009 11:45 PM
WHAT THE HECK~
By right I shouldn't be late one lor...!!!
~!@#$%^&*~!@#$%^&*~!@#$%^&*~!@#$%^&*~!@#$%^&*
as usual I alighted at the bus stop at Tampines 100+ to change bus 31 at 7.30 and my lesson start at 8am and there's 3 bus stops from my school so the journey is around 10 mins... isn't that i shouldn't be late ?

then bus 31 come , then full of people i cant sqeeue myself in... so forget it...
It take around 15 mins for the next one to come... it means 7.45 Im at the bus stop... what the heck of this ? =.=
then saw limei alighted from bus 168... then after awhile other bus 31 came also full of people... And I serious don't know how she managed to get in the bus...
I was like... ALL MY "BEAUTIFUL" LANGUAGE IS COMING OUT LOR !!! but nevermind~
The next bus 31 came at 20 mins later!!! what ~~~~~~~~~~~~!!! 8.05am still at the bus stop ! In the end i also didn't managed to get board the bus...

called chou hong whether wanna meet at interchange not cause his lesson start at 9am and it is around 8.15am then so he should be on his way to sch liaoz... we meeted interchange and go sch...

after school go home before going to bible study... sorry, reeve i was late again >.<
after the bible saw limei , kok wei and flinton siiting down there... so we walked abit before we walked to city hall plus reeve... then reeve and me went to Bugis...
after that I take bus 80 home...

A ANGEL OF GOD ?
I think she is one ...
I was talking to Janelle about my relationship and some problem
but don't why this lady sit beside me and pass a note when she alight...

It says

To : A Child Greatly Loved By Our Father

Dearest one,
It takes real courage & great determination to wait for the partner that God, our Father has prepared for us to meet. Sometime, we just need to trust Him and we will know with peace if you are His will. Our Father always give the best and sometimes we just need to wait foe the best, while we learn His love and being so secure in His love that we are ready to meet & know the right one...

P/S: I usually sit in the front but tonight I felt led to walk right to the back.and as you were speaking in an audihle range, I could hear your conversation & felt led to write you this note.
Cheers !
A missionart to china & sister in christ
Thank God for let me meeting this angel =)
Tuesday, October 13, 2009 10:43 PM
FUCK the new timetable la
almost everyday 8am , then around 2 - 5pm...
WHAT THE FUCK !!!
~!@#$%^&*~!@#$%^&*~!@#$%^&*~!@#$%^&*~!@#$%^&*

sms chou hong all the way while Im on my travel to school
then while I having IAC halfway... He don't know where to go A03-01
so I be the kind soul and walked out from my class to cafe 1 there to meet and bring him there...but then his classmate say his lesson start at 10am... haha...
it mean he see the wrong timetable... =.=
at least i showed him the place before i go back to class...
then during our lunch time, we walked to east point's KCF and eat...
and after school we meet again, go his place for awhile before i went to meet my bitch and he go work ... we went to eat Sakae Sushi and she buy me a love rabbit soft toys for me...that's so sweet of her sia... after the sushi meal , she followed me back to my place and chit chat more =) so ya... this is how my day...
Monday, October 12, 2009 9:17 PM


This is what I called it a KILLER rabbit... what a coward snake...


This is a sweet MV of lies [maple version]
Why I fall in love with the song, "lies" partly because of this video


This is a sweet Mv of Haru Haru [maple version]
8:27 PM

Finally see my result... I was phew ~
NO SUBJECTS FAIL !!!
Amen... Thank God sia =)

Today school supposed to dismiss at 5pm...
I did not went for the lesson from 11am onwards...
so i meet chou hong at the admin block gate at 11am...
when the bus 31 come, see his ex alighted from the bus...
but then she nvr saw us and we don't really care and just board the bus
went to parkway eat ice flake at 32 degrees fahrenheit =)
we shopped around parkway parade,
after that we went to the 吊娃娃 there to see dolls...
we sat down the beach there and chit chat...
then suddenly it was rain cats and dogs
and we managed to run into the shether before it gets really heavy
but we are all wet lor... some rain attack the shether sia...
like in shether ma jiang not like that... lolx...
then we went back to parkway parade again after the rain has gotten smaller...]
shopping abit more and went to tampines then we walked from interchange to his place there and i took bus 21 to pasir ris amd took bus 88 home =)

thanks god , for everything ... i love you , Lord...
8:09 AM
Yawn~ Today sch reopen !!!
kanna wake up by Dad again...
It was 6.40am in the morning lor...
give chou hong a morning call make sure he can wake up sia...
then I go sleep for another hour ... =P
haha... leaving my house soon so yeah...
will take some photo also =)


Hope today will be a good good day...
Sunday, October 11, 2009 8:50 PM




我知道的已经是越来越多
我只等你主动开口
坦白对我说
越靠得近
越暴露我们的寂寞
这样的爱远比分开
还要更难过
I'm Sorry 你说
最后还是选她不选我
尽管我陪你撑过生命之中
最坏的时候 我的温柔暖和双手
治好你的伤口
可是你说爱情世界
已由不得我
I'm Sorry 你说不想看我委屈的难过
虽然我还要比她更了解你
心理想甚么
要我放开
要我明白
是你要我接受
此刻的我却失去自由

I still don't know my heart well but I know God will have his ways...
But he knows the way I take; when He has tested me,
I shall come forth as gold =)
6:32 PM
Hehe... just wake up from a tired day sia...

last evening meet Yuhuan at 5.30pm at my house bus stop there and set off the BBQ
The BBQ is OKOK lor and not so bad but we leave earlier due to Yuhuan's working the following day... And I wanna buy something from white sand so we walked all way from pasir ris park to white sand, but sad sia ... when the time , we reached... the shop closed liaoz =( but at least she managed to get what she wants so at least not that bad...

Then we take Bus 88 back to Hougang... Then suddenly wei kang wanna meet her for supper at hougang then she grab me along also like die die also want me to be there sia... hmmm weikang bought his friend ,jie xiong, along also... so we walked from Hougang Mrt to the 600 plus Macdonald... while during the supper, sms chatting with chou hong... after the supper we send Yuhuan home then the guys walked my house there to try their lucky whether is that still get last bus not but too bad sia...
so Pei them waited for cab before i went home... chatted on the phone with Chou Hong abit before I sleep , it was like 3 or 4 plus in the morning...

Today early in the morning , Vincent called me to remind me to come the service...
then I was so sleepy and tired sia... get the thought of don't care and continue sleeping but i try to stay awake up and went for the service... sms chat with Chou Hong again while on my way to church... today's sermon was great and I thank god that I had came for the service... went to Tampines mall to look for Wesley with Vincent and Manyau then we walked pass Seoul Garden , I managed to see Chou Hong
but i choose not to disturb him... eaten lunch then Manyau followed me back to Hougang ... so that I went home and he went to Hougang Gym... Due to over tireness, I fall asleep when the moment I touched my bed...

This very cute video wor =)
Even the cat knows how to ask God's forgiveness then WE human better reflect and repent !!!

The Best Part is Okay, i cant breathe any more, Amen... hey... what the hell you looking at ? oops... Dear God...
Saturday, October 10, 2009 11:59 AM
sleep at today's 4am plus... yawn~
still can wake up at 11 plus... 8 hours of sleep just nice sia...

just wanna say finally the time has come...
i has reconcile with chou hong =)
thank god that we can be friends even after that incident
is all because you make the 1st move...
hope we can put the past away ...

haha... we chat the whole night
cause too many things to catch up sia...
at least i go school , i wouldn't be scare to see you any more...
maybe is the better ending for us ba...
thanks forgiving me...
your forgiveness meant alot to me lor...

hmmm... well , today bowling session is cancelled ...
sad la... now at home very bored sia...
hope time can pass faster...
Friday, October 9, 2009 10:16 PM
To someone IMPORTANT :
I just read your blog...
and i dunno is it you writting to me not...

Kind of shocked to see you at T1 that day
just wanna say all the past...
Actually I've forgive you long ago...
is just I'm really dunno how to react to you...
scared you hate me for causing this thing into you...
i knows you suffers... that time i say alot of nasty things...
all was just out of my anger cause the pain of losing my little angel...
5 / 8 /09 inplanted a lot of pain and bitter into me...

i guess im alright now...
if you think we still be friend , pls msn me 1st cause i wanna know have you forgiven me not... i will be waiting =)
or not then we just stay a distance like now...

Is okay that you still cant forgive or hate me...
9:44 PM
haha... just reaching home...

wake up , 1st thing online...
Chrischelle msn me to meet at 5.15 Bugis
and Manyau last min says can't eat dinner with me
so i say okay to her

Go to Janelle's place to teach her chinese
In the end , she say dun wanna study... lolx... =.=
so just slack at her place with Heshen...
slack until 4.15 make my way to far east buy things then bugis...

Chrischelle was late today... but is okay , is alright...
she treated me to dinner as gift of thanking me for accompanying her =)

as we are going our seperate ways ... Manyau suddenly called me for dinner...
make my way down to Outram meet him after sending chrischelle board the bus...
headed back to Hougang , pei him eat dinner , help him buy Timothy's gift...
and dumb into Mingfu in the popular... lolx...

now chat with online with Yuhuan and some other friends...

Tomorrow Cell group bowling session and F1 gate 7 BBQ... I pray for good weather and smooth fellowship... hope tomorrow will be a good day...
12:25 PM
I'm in love with this worship song...
whenever i heard this , i cried and feel loved...
Its is called , For Janelle (whom God loves)
It is written for a younger girl who fight against cancer...



You hang the stars
your love makes them glow
you cares for the lilies
the sparrows you hold
I open my eyes
your mercies unfold
when i close my eyes
thats one thing i know

jesus love me
called me his own
jesus love me
he make me whole ~
jesus love me
heart overflow
it is well
it is well for my soul

you take my pain
and carried your cross
you kept all my tears drop and shed them like yours
you felt all my grief on calvary's hill
your heart was so broken
now i can be healed
11:15 AM
Dear God , I know the world of temptations
but teach me how walk in the sprirt but not in my own strength...
I'm just upset that some people misunderstand me
but i know you knows me from inside out...
when the world depreciate me but I still worth priceless in your eye...
I should not live for people but for you only...

I knows moulding is never a day process... it's never easy...

I agree with the unknown to a certain extent... since i know my mistake then i should be a better person... FAITH WITHOUT WORKS IS DEAD so I put into actions...

Thank you god , for those nice people like Fiona,Manyau,Michelle,Janelle,N246 and
w193... they are just like you when i fail, forgiveness and acceptance stands...
instead of judgement , understanding and patient come...

Especially Fiona, she been with me the most... for example this incident... The way she encourage me, says I has done nothing wrong , i'm looking at my mistakes and no matter what God still love me... the prescene of god is there when she say this , and i cried... sorry Lord , for my mistake...

This is what i called AGAPE LOVE !!! which the world can never give...
Love without conditions , a heart that always listen to a crying world
grace is all sufficient more than life could , all my past forsaken...
Whose hands are these, holding my trapeze,When I fly, You carry me
Whose eyes are these, watching over me,Eyes of love, that set me free
Because of you , heaven knows my name... what i've can give to gain this worthy ?

I know my weakness is i'm used to living in people's comments... i wanna breakfree from it... I should to take critizenism, learn how to be strong so that i can move on in life... Unafraid, what's ahead You are always there before me
My whole world, Your design You are always there, just right behind...
I love you, amen =)






haha... when i online atfer the cell group, reeve come talk to me that my testimony i shared was very powerful... he can see god is moving greatly in my life... hehex...

Thanks reeve >.< but i believe greater things has yet to come lor...

Thanks Manyau... for sharing your life with me... Brother , I love you also... jia you... you know you are strong and mighty...

Thanks vincent for seeing my maturity and commenting that I'm strong =)
i wanna be even more strong, i will grow more so that my life can testimony to all person who were lack of love... maybe im not in that stage yet but i will be one day... thanks for not forsakening me even when you knows what happened...

Thanks Fiona for the daily bread that changed my life... i've learning so alot from it =)

Thanks Janelle and Michelle for being dear sister to me =)
12:00 AM
To that unknown :
I just gonna say it one and for all...
I really wonder that do you REALLY understand what I've written ?
OR do you REALLY understand the meaning of 2 faces ?

I just gonna talk to you nicely

2 faces means you are living a double standard life and ENJOYs it...

1st thing i wanna rise is I said Im disgusted with my wrong doings if i have 2 faces what for i feel so remouseful about it... ?

2nd things is if you don't do wrong things then how you gonna feel remoseful and guilty ? For example , a kid dun lie then why he gonna feel guity about the lie...
Guiltness and remoseful don't come without a reason...

I'm just reflecting on my own actions and mistake... And being honest with myself !

Im also a human , everyone faces temptation... we make wrong decision at times but the most important is whether do we examin our life...

and some of my friends thinks that your english understanding is really bad...

anyway Im so sorry , i have made you sick... you can have the free will not to read my blog one =)

To That someone :
I'm also wanna say sorry... wanted to msn you that encourage you but i scared...
remember this , slience within the people around you does not mean no one knows...
in this world , there surely be some one who will cares... concern is inside...
never ever say when i suffer , no one knows... =)
Thursday, October 8, 2009 9:47 AM
Some people live for the fortune
Some people live just for the fame
Some people live for the power, yeah
Some people live just to play the game
Some people think that the physical things
Define what's within
And I've been there before
But that life's a bore
So full of the superficial


Some people want it all
But I don't want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby
If I ain't got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain't got you, Yeah

Some people search for a fountain
That promises forever young
Some people need three dozen roses
And that's the only way to prove you love him
Hand me the world on a silver platter
And what good would it be
With no one to share
With no one who truly cares for me


If I ain't got you with me baby
So nothing in this whole wide world don't mean a thing
If I ain't got you with me baby
Wednesday, October 7, 2009 10:32 PM
Happy birthday guardian angel and I has not forgottten about your birthday =)
Today wake up around 9am plus , spend some admiring myself in the mirror , make up and doll up myself before going to yuhuan’s workplace...
Haha... the people there were rather friendly and nice... time passed pretty fast for me... suppose to meet Janelle Tampines at 2 plus and I did not make it ... due to some misunderstanding of the meeting time then made Janelle super pissed... so I stay at the bebok lan shop until 3.30pm then i make my way to Tampines 1 to meet Michelle , Janelle and Qiwen...
While we were at Tampines 1 , saw the bastard who I dun wish to see ever again sia...
!@#$%^&*!@#$%^&*!@#$%^&*!@#$%^&*!@#$%^&*!@#$%^&*!@#$%^&* lor
When the moment I saw him, I was in the state of shock for around 5 seconds... sia la... kind of don’t know how to react... In the end, I can’t help but to burst into tears ... I even choose to forgive him and forget about the incident but when the way I react, I’m still not ready to face him personally...
Aiyo, never managed to go to this week bible study again... thank god I go through this lesson before or else great loss...
Haha... just reach home... pretty planning to go bath 1st and online with friends again =)
Hope tomorrow can be a better day !!!
Tuesday, October 6, 2009 7:26 PM
I think I'm kind of digusted with myself...
what a slutty bitch I am...
why cant I resist the temptation of a very cute and handsome guy...
go ahead and think whatever you want and I don't freaking care !!!

I'm here to write down my feelings and not receive judgement...
what happened you people don't need to know (only two girls knows)

I feel like !@#$%^&*!@#$%^&*
cause why I behave this way !!!
I abmit that I evny of being in a relationship
everytime when i choose to move on , there's guilt create within me that make me feel i can't betray my feelings and plus what happened to me during july...
what is the freaking problem with me la...

I should have love myself more lor , learn to say no lor !

guys are all F&R [fuck and run] when they need you , treat you like precious , when they say sayonara no one can stop , heart from fresh become metal one leh... all this from my personal experience, friend's experience , newspaper and bleah bleah...

Guys play play , people say is normal can understand
Girls play play , people call you bitch or slut...
1:14 AM
我可以忍受你不够爱我
你心里暗恋她一年多
我可以忍受你有别梦
你我梦想的差距
我相信那时你的隐瞒代表你至少还在意我的感受
我可以忍受眼神的空洞
牵手的时候不用心,沉默的时候又太用心
我可以忍受你时间不够用
你有许多需做不完的事
却不能忍受做了那么多
是她拥有,我该得到的温柔
在你blog说什么她开心就好,静静地守护她...
那些是梦寐以求的温柔,在一起的三个月
每天为了你的忽冷忽热哭泣,求你对我好一点
每当我快要哭出来的时候,只要你的一个sms就是晴天
对你没有什么要求,只要你当我是你女朋友多一点
每天不陪我没有关系,心里想着她没关系,无法遵守对我的成若没关系

我以为这样我们的感情就长久
我还是忘不了那天你SMS我说分手的情景和心情
爱着你是我改不了也不愿改的习惯
要放下那有那么简单?
知道你心里想着她是我说不出也不承认的悲哀
包容你是我无私的爱,你却说我们有距离
不要说对不起,原来你要的不是我
为何是她拥有我没看过的笑容
Monday, October 5, 2009 8:09 PM





Today went out with my bitch singing at K-box again...
We tried something very stupid , funny and might get us blacklisted from K-box...
we played songs from my handphone and amplified it through the microphone...
somemore real loud until the neibouring few rooms can hear...
somemore the songs i played is not provided in K-box also... lolx... =.=
but the staff who passed by our room remained ignorant...
some more i was dancing " I DON'T CARE" then some guys were watching
super paiseh >.<

just reach home now, hosting my guess again =P
tired and sleepy ... ZZZ...
12:01 PM

我又为你哭了
三个月的感情却让我思念到如今
我难过喔~ 身边好像都一对一对
最近分手的朋友有几个,但是他们都放下了
还有一个分手后,又展开了新的恋情
为何我还是那么爱着你?
多希望我能忘了你,有新的恋爱可是 no matter I try and try , I cant say good bye...
我痛苦的是我还放不下

你那时在我blog的留言是我们的相遇
那个留言是我注意你的存在的开始
不换 blog url 是不想你找不到
希望你会再留言多一次
可是你对我的事还是不闻不问
而我却躲在你看不见角落,天使般守护你

老实说我还是介意你的话,说我小孩子气不够成熟
我还是介意你的谎,为何在一起时不诚实...
Sunday, October 4, 2009 10:05 PM
我還是介意你的話
總在無意間變化
介意你對愛的想法
和我有了分岔
8:57 PM




Today wake up , eat breakfast as usual but without daddy at this time around
went to eat the S11 beside the AMK Hub... after that some shopping =)
Mitju shoe sales , managed to a pair for me...
shop awhile more later , then rush to Bugis to meet Ah Fio [Fiona]
I left AMK at 1.30pm thought i was gonna be late and i took mrt there
but the whole journey only took me 25mins =.=
thank God that I'm not early but then Ah Fio is even early... lolx...
went to eat with Ah fio , see her eat only... hahax...
went the new shopping center at the bugis and shop, paiseh forget the name of the shopping and i can just say my wallet cant tahan the price!
went to Bugis Street to shop some more, so long nvr go there, sia la so many temptation!!! haha... see the necklance I wanted to buy at far east and it is so much cheaper at Bugis !!! of cause BUY la and sucessfully empty my pocket once again... lolx...
went at home and eat and sleep...
waiting for my night life cause now the night is still early =)

haha, Guardian Angel went for cambo for 1 week, sad la...
we are still transparent to each other... =(
my heart thinks of something more ...
Tuesday, September 29, 2009 10:59 AM
Finally realise that Im nothing with you
I was wrong and forgive me...
My heart broken like a a wave
My heart shaken like wind
My heaer vanished like smoke
It cant be removed like a tattoo
I sigh deeply as if a ground is going to cave in
Only dust piled in my mind
I know i wouldn't be able to live even one day without you
but i somehow managed to live longer than i thought
you don't answer anything as i cry out
I hope for a vain exceptation but now it's useless
Boy , can you even see me ?
Do you forget completely ?
Im worried , i feel anxiety
Because i cant get close nor try to talk to you
I spend long night by myself
Easing my thoughts a thousand times
I thought i can don't look back and leave
don't find you and live
And i have no regrets loving you
take only the good memories with me
hope i cant bear in some way
or i can stand on some way
you should be more happy if you are like this
then i become dull day by day
everytime we pass by each other , you always act like you didn't see me
if you still keeping our memories then i might look for you secretly
Monday, September 28, 2009 11:48 AM
finally the job is over and the $300 in secure in my pocket... now is waiting for my pay and the ch

F1 ushering day 2 [26 sep o9]
report to work at 12.15 at F1 gate 7
haha...
my 1st duty of the day is directing people to use which entry lane and stop from people for bring food inside before the gate...
there's 2 ang mo carrying a coffee drinks (tcc)
then me and my friend yuhuan stopped that 2 ang mo
they choose to consume it before entering the gate
they suddenly walk toward us again...
at first thought what they wanna do sia...
in the end , is finding us to chit chat... =.=
They even praise we are the cutest usher in F1...
I just wanna smile smile and say thanks...
any way I got no interest for ang mo lor...
after that... take over the scanner team for them to have dinner...
after they return from their break , is my dinner time...
after dinner , go outside and give out map to the people...
There is another of group of people selling headphone in our area...
there is pretty cute guy catch my attention...
so we go there flirt abit while working... =P
say what i guess correct his age, he will give me french kiss... lolx =.=
in the end , i guess the age correctly...
after work , saw him again at macdonald
managed to exchange num with him =)
no worries , not interest in him...
To my guradian angel my heart shall belong...
when to suntec convection for my friend's dad for a ride
go home sleep again...

F1 ushering day 3 [27 sep 09]
The first duty of the same as day day 2
everything the same so not much different
managed to get a free starbucks coffee my primary friend , suzie
sia la... yuhuan leave her handphone in toilet
we went to look for the handphone...
while finding , i was praying in my heart...
thank God for the kind soul who returned the handphone...
continue work again as soon as the handphone was returned
this time round never disturb the cute guy so is 他忙的我忙的
haha... this time some round , some ang mo wanna take photo with me ...
then the ang mo who flirts me , recongise me sia...
they come flirt again , before they leave they praise me again...
this time round only praise me, "you are the cutest singaporean girl"
haha... sms that cute guy to go back home together, and he agreed.
today after briefing was long sia... he called , like 等到不耐烦 >,<
so the 3 of us went home together ...
reach hougang statiom called janelle to talk cause scare to walk alone...
reach home sleep sleep sleep

really thank God for strength... or else i will sure die one le...
God i love you =) amen
Saturday, September 26, 2009 2:40 AM
F1 Ushering day 1 [25 sep 08]
nothing to blog abut the event much...
is just having fun checking and scanning people's ticket pass =)

then thanks god that my friend's dad is willing to drive us home...
so after the duty we sit at the macdonald and slack to wait for her father...
at first i though we can receive Hougang smoothly...
who knows i left my F1 pass and tee-shirt at where...
then i ask the uncle to go back to suntec convention center
to the macdonald where bag is last seen
Dur to the F1 alot of roads is closed...
on the way back i keep praying to God for mercy...
we took a very very very very very big round just to go back
and i already feel very paiseh... =x
when we reach at the convection center , we spemd around 30 mins to 45 mins
just to get the marina square macdonald... Lolx...
because we are lost and all exits are closed...
thank god , i found my things at macdonald or else (T.T)
then get the ride back to Hougang...

Thank God for his grace and mercy for this stupid incident... Thank God for the strength for today... Just wanna say , Father i love you and i know yout grace is more than i need... last but not least my Guardian Angel even he is no longer in my life but because he used to tell me that no matter what situation, not till the last finally decision dun give up and having faith to believe... =)
Friday, September 25, 2009 12:37 AM
Why i stop blogging for a period of time is because nothing is worth blogging without my guardian angel's prescene...
we are like strangers like that...
At first there was a period of time we still talk abit here and there...
then now we dun talk again... sad la =(
without him there is nothing in blogging...
I so used to blogging about him. lor.. Don't think he will come and read my blog lor
I abmit that i still haven forgetten him , have the desire to patch with him
but now i leaving everything to the hands of the lord...
All i want now is we can continue be friends, don't be so awkward when we see each other...

The memories of ours...
A night as the raining was falling
you come back to my memory
I promised myself to be fine without you
but I can't help it
I drank alcohol just to drunk myself
but I still feel empty
A day without you is too long ~
I tried praying to forget you
Without you I cant even find happiness
I cant even cry
I don't wanna live my life without you
Its pissed me off and I going crazy
I want to see you but I cant
I'm so sorry but I love you
I cant treasure you enough
and I know I need you
because of my childish , out of anger you pushed me away with your words
I so sorry, I really love you even more more
we shouldn't have broke up...
I've been left alone wandering through it all
where are you ? my habit of calling you...
will you slowly forget me so i can be in pain ?
I hope it's a dream because I only can take so much
I still cant forget you...
I dont think Iever will...
Even till the day I die...
Thursday, September 24, 2009 3:47 AM
Sorry People for not updating >.<
Alot of things happened in my life
i shall not disclose [only close friends knows]
so please dun ask why and why...

Back to blogging mood...
still on the way of recovering from hurts and disappointments
One Thing to say God is good all the time and all time God is good
thanks people for not forsaken me...
I realised i has grow more spiritually mature =)
Thanks to those who teach me please trust in God when i still in my depression of pain...
Went for Foundation Truth 1 [FT1] lesson 2 at riverwalk today, even though i have FT1
before... but always good to take a revision...
Learn alot of things today... Amen...
A WHOLE NEW LEVEL OF REVELATION = A WHOLE NEW LEVEL OF FAITH !

And I just sign up for twitter...
spend around 1 hour to make it work... =.=
get super pissed with twitter
!@#$%^&*()_(*&^%$#@!@#$%^&*(
Hope it dun give me the stupid again ...
www.twitter.com/spiritualahlian

one more thing to say :
we having saving faith when we believe what bible says about us and about Jesus chirst, and when we act upon that truth by placing our trust in Him.
Friends , let believe in Him together ... =)
Saturday, June 27, 2009 1:10 AM
i think i need God more than anything else...
cause he is close to the broken hearted

i wanna confess this
in my walk with god there's
ain't no mountain high enough ,
ain't no valley low enough ,
ain't river wide enough
to keep me getting to my lord, God

i remembered the day you set free
and i know that i can always count on you
no temptations and failures can stop me
cause you are my heart desire...
if im in the trouble , you will be there in the double...
my love is alive right there in my heart although i can be dry something...
Friday, June 19, 2009 7:21 AM
19 June 2009 , 7:22AM

I loves LOVE
but I gonna stay true
my moral get me on knees
I beg LOVE stop playing games

I don't know what is it
But LOVE got me good
As you know you could

I don't know LOVE do
but it do it well
I'M UNDER YOUR SPELL~

why wouldn't you realease me?
i say realeaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee~ me !!!
i say you better realeaseee ~ me !!!
Thursday, June 18, 2009 11:05 PM
18 JUNE 2009 , 11:06PM

sia la this blogskin never displace for the date of the post
so i must type manually liaoz =(

[in crying mood now ='(]
Now i wonder my prescene in people's life...
i just reading finish my guardian angel's blog...
suddenly something struck and leaded me into deep thoughts,
he appreciation those ppl to stay by his side in blog, feel suddenly where am i ?
i always encourage him and support him through sms and spiritually...
why the gap are so big and far ?
all i want is to be near you...

i always treat my friend with the best that i can ...
why people also kick me or summon when they like ?
is my love for people is not strong enough is it ?

i always run the extra mile for the people i loves...
sometime really feel people taked me as granted...

what is PREFECT LOVE ?
Freely you gave it all for us and surround the life upon that cross...
show me how to love people again , bring me back to the cheerful and sunshine me...
the first love of being a person who is full of love...
i'm not the xuan'er no longer that you all know...
cause im so broken right here , right now...
im just bleeding inside...
i know a girl who has a bf, when she just get bullied by classmate,
her bf rushed all the way to school to settle with the bullies,
when she cried , he spend time with her and comfort her...
but i'm so weaker than her , i need people to support me too...
when will i meet a guy who says he love me and willing go the extra mile just for me ?
i hate all my relationships...
Monday, June 15, 2009 11:33 AM
i though NO MORE running wild ...
But i still RUNNING like a aimless crazy girl...

ALOT of things has happened...
Im feel SO BLOODY broken and damaged NOW
who cares ?
The guys i dated make me feel like a toy or not seriously treated
except my guardian angel...
it like a curse or what ? why it's always repeat like a cycle ?
Tml will be the 5 months we break up liaoz(with my guardian angel)

SOMETHING HAPPENED and only those intimate friends will knows...
Im emotionally dying bit by bit...
i think guys can be heartless and selfish in nature...
all i desire is to have someone who loves me with all his heart and stay till marriage...(provided i love him too)

all my ex make me feel that their words are lies... i wanna trust them , but i cant!!!
But my guardian angel is just different cause even though he can treat me like don't know what and very ungentleman at times... i really that feel he still treated me with love and respect... abt his words , i will sense that this from the bottom of his heart even though it may sounded unpleasent at times.

Please keep me in prayer to break this chain... I must learn to love myself MORE... I so touch by GOD's LOVE... Human's love can be beautiful but yet selfish... But GOD'S beautiful and selfless... A LOVE which only obtain TRUE acceptance... in GOD, i'm truly LOVED...
Monday, April 6, 2009 9:21 AM
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO KIMBERLY JIE !!!
GOD is blessing you now ~
wish you other 365 days of joy...
loves you <3

我还在想你喔
两个礼拜没有见到你了
到底是要远远看你还是靠近一点更好
我不确定你是不是我的白马王子
我用骗人的祈祷骗自己我现在很好
和你在一起的每分每秒就像走过彩虹隧道
Monday, March 30, 2009 1:22 PM
42 天了
还是没有他的消息
今天SOT开课了,真的很想当面说一声,“加油”
还是不敢和他说话

还以为我已经习惯没有他的日子
原来我只会安慰自己没有他的日子一样能过
可是我真的跨不过他曾给的未来
Friday, March 27, 2009 11:45 AM
Oh no~
while i was surfing youtube...
i found THIS !!!

TurTLE FUCKING A ShOE TECHNO REMIX~ !!!

TERMS AND CONDITION APPLYS !!!
THE FOLLOWING CONTENT MAY CAUSE IRRIATITIONS
FOR SPECIAL HELP ,PLEASE TALK TO YOUR DOCTOR
MENTAL AND PARENTAL GUILDANCE ARE ADVICED
PLEASE WATCH THE ORGINAL VIDEO BEFORE WATCHING THIS !

Thursday, March 26, 2009 1:48 PM


THIS IS SO CUTE LA...
THE TURTLE IS FUCKING THE SHOE AND IT MOAN WOR ~
DIE DIE MUST WATCH MAN !!!



THIS IS THE JAPANESE TOIET PRANK
IS VERY FUNNY ~ WORTH WATCH WOR =)
I ADMIT I WILL CRY IF THIS HAPPANED TO ME
AND THE MORAL OF THE STORY IS : DO NOT USE THE ROADSIDE TOIET IN JAPAN !!!
SUPPORT BY TABITHA(ME) , KIMBERLY & GEORGE !

BEFORE YOU WATCH , PLEASE TURN OFF THE SOUND FROM MY IMEEM =)
11:54 AM
haha...
看来你最近好想喜欢上“够爱”这首歌
那是我跟你刚分手的时候一只听的歌 =P

突然听到陈结仪的“看月亮”
是一个首满老的歌
让我十分有感触
也让我想起那些有你的夜晚
那些在amk park , punggol park , sunplaza park 和在你家附近的pathway
每一个都是我的 precious memories
也许你不知道,你给我的回忆每一个都那么的美
我一个人去我们增经去过的地方,从温以前的味道
想念以前的快乐,想念以前的我们
无论无何你永远都是我的 Guardian angel =)

“看月亮”- 陈洁仪

也许你不知道也许你早知道已经不重要
我是真的要走了
树叶慢慢摇动街灯慢慢闪动
你的声音对我竟然那么温柔
你曾对我很好你曾对我不好
已经不重要 爱过已经很好
我应该感谢你 在沉默很久后给我拥抱
从前看月亮 有你在身旁
感觉温暖
在你眼眶中总是有微笑还有体谅
独自看月亮 我也有快乐
感觉清凉
爱不需要占有 爱让你我自由
不再迷惘
yayayayaya.....
也许你不知道也许你早知道已经不重要
我是真的要走了
树叶慢慢摇动街灯慢慢闪动
你的声音对我竟然那么温柔
你曾对我很好你曾对我不好
已经不重要 爱过已经很好
我应该感谢你 在沉默很久后给我拥抱
从前看月亮 有你在身旁
感觉温暖
在你眼眶中总是有微笑还有体谅
独自看月亮 我也有快乐
感觉清凉
爱不必变狠 至少有个人让回忆不冷
从前看月亮 有你在身旁
感觉温暖
在你眼眶中总是有微笑还有体谅
独自看月亮 我也有快乐
感觉清凉
爱不需要占有 爱让你我自由
不再迷惘
Monday, March 23, 2009 11:51 PM
35天了
身边的人都叫我该放手了
他们都说你已经把我给忘了
知道你过得开心就好
恭喜你能报读SOT 和 找到一份工作
觉得上帝真的对你好好喔
看来没有的我的日子
你过得快乐多了=)


现在才明白你要的爱不只是依赖
也要像一个大男孩,风吹又日晒
生活自由自在!
以前我只会疑神疑鬼,
不停地在想谁是你的那个唯一
是我还是她 ?
让你为难,我应该相信你的
当你说爱我的时候就是爱我不应该再质问下去
身为一个女朋友,我没有你要的温柔和体贴
是我自私的爱让你喘不过气吧

真的觉得自己好傻
为何要等你已无法承受而选择离开后才懂事 ?
可惜一切都太迟了
你已经往前走

如今还是只想和你做朋友
像以前一样
还是好怕和你说话等等
haiz ~ =(
Monday, March 16, 2009 11:51 AM
第四个礼拜了
28天了
也就是一个月了=(

谢谢,你在上个礼拜三主动sms我
虽然只是一个sms ,心里真的是好开心
原本以为我们可以像朋友那样联络
Reply了你的sms,结果到今天都等不到你的reply
我们真的能做朋友?
我真的不希望我们会变成最熟悉的陌生人
有时候真的好奇你在做什么...
这一个月你是怎样过得?
我这里心情有点糟 , 那你呢?
我这里十分想念你, 那你呢?
我这里一切都变了 , 我变得懂事了...
而你呢?
如果我们现在还在一起会是怎样 ?
我们是不是还深爱着对方像开始时那样,握着手就算幸福了
我们现在还在一起会是怎样?
你是不是还在隐瞒着你和她的事 ?
Monday, March 9, 2009 11:56 AM
又是一个礼拜过了 =(
已经是第三个星期了
我真的好想你喔
我觉得我真的好没用,连和你说话的勇气都没有

想做你的朋友,至少能留在你的身边
好想跟你聊天,说话和站在你旁边
只怪我自己不够勇敢,总是一个人傻傻地,默默地,远远地守护你又不靠近
上个拜六,明明知道你就在我后面
却不敢转头看你一眼,
现在的我好像一个害羞的小猫咪等你主动一点
我的 msn nick 说着我想要的
不知是你没看见还是真的不管也不理 ?

分手的一个礼拜
每个人都好贴心,每天都轮流陪我
半夜还要听我的电话,从来不嫌烦
家人和朋友买好多东西哄我开心,叫我别想那么多
大家都说永远不再松开我的手,黑夜很快就会过去

第二个礼拜
感觉上大家的关心好像变少了
大家开始自己该做的事,陪我的时间已经大大减少了
还是叫我别想那么多,叫我不要自感堕落了
对我说的话有一点带刺,说是为我好

第三个礼拜
大家都希望我不要在想他了
在大家面前,难过还要坚强
每天要假装快乐,每一夜对天花板哭泣
每一夜都跟神聊天,只有在神的存在才能释放我自己
三个礼拜了,为何黑夜还不过去 ?
我想站起来可是我就是不能
我想神许的愿望会实现吗?
可能我太急了, 或许应该顺其自然
Monday, March 2, 2009 10:58 AM
今天是你离开的14天
我的心和伤都还没愈合
想你泪会流
我知道分手了就该回到原点
这14天,每一天在想你过得怎样
没有一天不流泪
没有一天不思念
想让你听一听我的心跳
要你知道我睡得不好
逛街想见你
搭车想见你
合眼闭眼睛看的全是你

虽然我们已经分手了
可是我的爱还是只能让你一个人独自拥有
唯一能走出这些伤的方法就是遗忘你
可是我就是做不到
我现在只能压抑住对你的爱
难过却假装坚强
让我的灵和魂魄会一直守在你心门口
不管等不等到回应
我的伤和眼泪已经化为血海为你而流
这些是我为你做的最后一件事
我只想把对你的爱埋在内心深处
和往前走...
也是一种不想难为你和不想忘记你的解脱
我真的不想再谈恋爱了
男人全部都是不能相信的东西!!!
Monday, February 16, 2009 12:22 PM
他终于把分手说出来了
我没有挽留他
不勉强他再为我了心不在
人留不留都是痛

只怪我爱得那么汹涌
爱得那么深
于是梦醒了,搁浅了,沉默了
分手了 却回不了神...
如果当初在你对我告白时能忍住爱你的冲动
也许今夜我不会让自己在分手的伤里沉沦

如果我们真的有缘让我们第二次爱上对方
就在续前缘吧...我不想再碰爱这种东西了
至少不是现在,我会把对你的爱深埋在心里
我们便成世上最熟悉的陌生人
从今各走各的,各自悲哀
我会试着不会想你的一切,
可是我还是不要把我对你的爱给忘了
让我静静的爱着你,默默地守在你的身边
化身为隐形的天使,风和雨守在你身边

风没有方向地吹来
风伴着你开心,悲伤

雨也跟着悲伤起来
雨代我的眼泪落向大海
Tuesday, February 10, 2009 3:06 PM
难道真的要失去,你才会珍惜 ?
难道真的要我伤痕累累,你才会知道我受伤 ?
如果有一天,我默默无言的离开,你会知道吗 ?
即使知道了你又会怎样 ?
你的理由总是好多,我只能相信真的

给你的情人节礼物已经买好了
情人节当天才交给你吧
第一次害怕情人节
原本期特和你一起过情人节的
现在不敢渴望太多
你可能连答应陪我情人节都忘了吧

你说你不忍心伤害我,可是我已经深深地被你伤害
我和其他的女孩一样...
想做自己爱人的公主,拥有那平凡的幸福
被你深深的呵护和疼爱

朋友还是情人 ?我好像已经分不清了
你说这六月内没想过要和我分手,相信时间能改变一切
让我觉得我对你是珍贵的,感觉像情人
你又没有对我比别人多一点,有时又对我不理不睬
让我觉得我对你而言是多余的,感觉像朋友

为什么这样子 ?
每一次我想把我们的爱拼凑好和从来的时候
你总是什么都没做,老是一样的问题
叫你不要这样,不要那样或对我好一点
好像什么都没有改变到

我原本对爱失去了信心
不想碰爱这种东西,一心如死海
原本我再不期特有什么美好会到来
在绝望时遇见你,起初对你的好还是怀疑
和你相处久了对爱的感觉悄悄重生
你用温柔让我的心回温,好像换一个和会跳的心
你是曾经求我的天使,现在却是伤害我最深的恶魔
应该幸福的恋爱竟然含有着你的隐瞒,我的自私和我们的无知
当初我们不够成熟坦白
我们的爱就如你所说差异一直存在
而我的等特竟累积成伤害
难道我会和你相爱只是一场意外 ?

你是还想给我们的爱多一次机会还是分手说不出来 ?
你说了这么多,做的有多少?
或许你为我做的一切都被你给的伤害掩盖住吧
真的还爱你,想相信你,或许你也是不知所措
12:10 AM
just reach home wor ~
thank god , this time around not more being lock outside the door =)
thank god , that my daddy drive me home as well...

*9 Feb 09 Monday
sleeping at home till 5pm plus
meet kimberly at punggol clinic
then we set off to tampines to see the xin toa
haha... we went to shop 1st while waiting for joshua
finally bought valentine gift for my guradian angel...
i find the gift very cute and it's a mini organiser
but it still cost expenese cause it is from japan

finally shopping for 30 mins , joshua then arrive and pick us up
see the people there 拜拜 and tiao tang...
then she was scare by the tiao tang ...
cause one part is the tiao tang people must the sharp weapons like swords and needle balls to hurt themselves...
after the tiao tang thingy , we walked to the tampines interchange and eat Macdonald
while eating half way , my daddy suddenly say he gonna drive me home... cause he is at the Old Tampines Road see they see the Taosim thingy... so it is 顺路
get my ride home... still get alot of things in my mind , but i believe god will do something...
Monday, February 9, 2009 12:52 AM
Hehe... i just reach home...
almost get myself lock outside of my house door
cause i only get the key for the 铁门
then they had lock the 木门
so i press the door bell twice
waited for awhile no one open the door for me sia =.=
so i put down my stuff and prepare to sleep at my doorstep
then my maid came to my rescure but she flared at me wor
cause i disturb her sleep... then i scold her back =P

*8 Feb 09 Sunday
wake around at 12 plus ...
don't know what funny thing i do in my house again
but nevermind is nothing not important
intially gonna meet my ex , kelvin
then ask kimberly to tag along
then he suddenly says he wanna stay at home don't know why
went to kimberly's place to pick her up again...
then we headed to tampines cause she need to pass her bf something
at first i though after pass him the thing then we can go off
who knows we are struck there cause they are doing the xing toa thingy
simply meaning is taosim event / celebrate of god's birthday
hmmm... we stay there until we have to catch the last bus back to hougang
send her home again then i walk home again... =)
by the time reach home i already half dead
Saturday, February 7, 2009 11:10 PM
Today kimberly can't make it for church due to her friend's birthday celebration
went to meet Michelle at her place... stuff oursleves with alot of pasta !!!
cause we not planing to eat during the fellowhship
meet Wesley Emo and Janelle to go church with me...
the sermon was great ~ ! love it man...

A happy relationship is one of the factor for success in life...

In order to have happy relationship / marriage
1. sharing of life - communication !
2. understanding - considerate of each other !
3. give honour - appreciation !

Woman's number 1 need is Affection

1 Corinthians 7 : 3 (NEW KING JAMES VERSION)
Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband.

1 Corinthians 7 : 3 (KING JAMES VERSION)
Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.

1 Corinthians 7 : 3 (THE GOOD NEWS BIBLE)
A man should fulfill his duty as a husband, and a woman should fulfill her duty as a wife, and each should satisfy the other's needs.

1 Corinthians 7 : 3 (THE AMPLIFIED BIBLE)
The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights (goodwill, kindness, and what is due her as his wife), and likewise the wife to her husband.

1 Corinthians 7 : 3 (NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION)
The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband.

1 Corinthians 7 : 3 (NEW LIVING TRANSLATION)
The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs.

歌 林 多 前 書 7:3 (Chinese Union Version (Simplified))
丈 夫 当 用 合 宜 之 分 待 妻 子 ; 妻 子 待 丈 夫 也 要 如 此

Pastor Kong also challenge all the males to treat their love ones with affection
and guys should learn from King Solomon...

is a song of solomon to his wife

Song of Solomon 4
THE Beloved
1 Behold, you are fair, my love!
Behold, you are fair!
You have dove’s eyes behind your veil.
Your hair is like a flock of goats,
Going down from Mount Gilead.
2 Your teeth are like a flock of shorn sheep
Which have come up from the washing,
Every one of which bears twins,
And none is barren among them.
3 Your lips are like a strand of scarlet,
And your mouth is lovely.
Your temples behind your veil
Are like a piece of pomegranate.
4 Your neck is like the tower of David,
Built for an armory,
On which hang a thousand bucklers,
All shields of mighty men.
5 Your two breasts are like two fawns,
Twins of a gazelle,
Which feed among the lilies.
6 Until the day breaks
And the shadows flee away,
I will go my way to the mountain of myrrh
And to the hill of frankincense.
7 You are all fair, my love,
And there is no spot in you.
8 Come with me from Lebanon, my spouse,
With me from Lebanon.
Look from the top of Amana,
From the top of Senir and Hermon,
From the lions’ dens,
From the mountains of the leopards.
9 You have ravished my heart,
My sister, my spouse;
You have ravished my heart
With one look of your eyes,
With one link of your necklace.
10 How fair is your love,
My sister, my spouse!
How much better than wine is your love,
And the scent of your perfumes
Than all spices!
11 Your lips, O my spouse,
Drip as the honeycomb;
Honey and milk are under your tongue;
And the fragrance of your garments
Is like the fragrance of Lebanon.
12 A garden enclosed
Is my sister, my spouse,
A spring shut up,
A fountain sealed.
13 Your plants are an orchard of pomegranates
With pleasant fruits,
Fragrant henna with spikenard,
14 Spikenard and saffron,
Calamus and cinnamon,
With all trees of frankincense,
Myrrh and aloes,
With all the chief spices—
15 A fountain of gardens,
A well of living waters,
And streams from Lebanon.

I think the message is somehow is speaking to my guardian angel...
hope what pastor preach today will get into his head and start to show me some affections... i will be waiting =)

after the service , N246 and W193 fellowship at different places...
so go seperated with Michelle they all ... =(
after the fellowship , all my members is taking train from Changi Airport and i'm the only one who has bus home ... felt so alone again...
12:15 AM
reach home late again =.=
cell group meeting was good
love denise's preaching and the message

* 6 Feb 09 Friday
early in the morning kanna waken by my maid
cause michelle called me then i nvr pick up
so she called my house... lolx
reason being she woke up late for school again
so no pointing going to school
then she meet me wearing her uniform...
Wesley Emo send her to my place before going school for exam

first i bought michelle to the place which i bought my guardian angel to on 大年初一
we sit there for awhile and chat... the wind was nice and the sky was very blue
i can feel the serenity there...
after that we walk back to my place
and i've never be a good host to michelle
cause i just dump her in the living room let she do whether she wants
for me , i lied on my bed and sleep... who ask she disturb my sleep in the morning
wake up at 12 pm plus , bath and accompany michelle back home
stay at her place for awhile...

meet wesley Emo and we went to Bugis and shop...
thinking of buying a Muji (无印良品)organiser as my guardian angel's valentine gift
due to he has poor time management , hope this will help him in organise things and he once told me he can have endless thing to do...
my 心情医生 once told me that Muji organiser is very good but it is very costly
i think he deserve it so even is costly but it will still be worth it...
due to the time is very rush so we didn't go Muji and take a look at the organiser
cause we spend most of our time in the neoprint shop and Bugis street...
after the shopping, went to pick kimberly up at tampines before we set off to joanna's place for cell group...
after the cell , the four of us went to fellowship on our own at white sand Macdonald
muahahahaha...
send kimberly home as usual...
then i walked home again...
Thursday, February 5, 2009 11:47 PM
today my ex,kelvin came all the way from chua chu kang to hougang
just to 陪 me eat breakfast ... I love to eat Macdonald breakfast ~ !
thanks for treating me Macdonald breakfast always...

invited him to my place after the breakfast since he got nothing on...
once again i being a very bad host , like what i did to michelle, i do it onto him also... so i sleep in my room and let him stay in the living room and use the desktop...
around 6pm plus he went to jurong for cell then i continued sleeping
so don't think dirty please !
I SAY NOTHING HAPPENED MEAN NOTHING BETWEEN US !!!
NO CHEMISTRY , NO SPARKS , NOTHING AND NOTHING...
FULL STOP , NO WILD AND DIRTY IMAGINATION PLEASE ~ !
we are just purly friend even though he still get feelings for me
trust my words or not is up to you all...
even my family wish i can patch with him but i don't want
i'm totally faithful to my guardian angel and i love him =)
even though he dun treat me well is okay...
time can change everything
12:26 AM
yawn~ just reach home from Yishun...
its been awhile I last step into Yishun
and its been super awhile i step into Yishun to find someone else
(expect my guardian angel even though wester kor live in Yishun too)

* 4 Feb 09 (Wednesday)
wake up at 12pm plus...
saw kor's emo sms
吓倒我咯
马上 call kor 问他发生什么事
sms 看起来有事可是声音却听起来没事 =.=
陪他在电话聊天
他放工后,我便到 Yishun
went to kor's place
borrow his mountain bike and cycle around the whole yishun
(kor jogging and i cycling)
feel a bit paiseh when I cycle pass guardian angel's house
what if i saw him how ? how should i react ?
(actually hope to see him... hehe... =P)
stupid kor la... who ask me to cycle pass avenue 11 -_-"
after the excerise , went back to kor's place rest for awhile
smsed my guardian angel , so sad that he is still in school
and i told i cycled pass his place
then he thought i cycled from Hougang and Yishun...
haha... oh yeah... funny sia as if i know the way like that

at dinner kor treat me to eat at Xing Wang Hong Kong Cafe
after the dinner , we take shuttle bus from Yishun Mrt to Sembawang Shopping Center
is my 1st time to Sembwang Shopping Center wor...
Honestly there's nothing much to shop
but managed to pamper myself with something
suddenly last minute kor's friend chio us to play bowling at the Orchid Country Club
so I was okay lor since i don't wanna go home =P
meet kor's friends , almost all of they are bowling pro sia
i was the damn noob one lor...
thank god that kor open a noob lane for me and play the more noob players
in the end get owned by his friend =.="
i was like helping them to clean drain rather than playing bowling...
after the game... kor's friend drive me to hougang
we drive pass my guardian angel's place then go through the upper seletar camp
i come to a conclusion yishun can be quite near to hougang...
just need to go through upper seletar camp...
maybe next time try cycling to yishun haha then give him a big suprise ... =)

the last time i visit his place on the 23 dec 08
i kind of miss his room , his bed , his scent of room
the thing i miss the most is how we used to be
now we was like never talk much and its has been awhile we last hang out
i really need to feel him here with me,hope things will improve as time goes by..
Tuesday, February 3, 2009 10:28 PM
Please take me somewhere we can be alone
I'll be waiting there's left to do is run
You'll be the prince and the I'll be the princess

Can you plaese save me, then try to tell me how to feel
This love is difficult, but it's real,
Don't be afraid
We'll Make it out of this mess

I got tired of waiting
Wondering if you would ever coming around
My faith in you was fading
I want to said
Can you please save me I've been feeling so alone
I keep waiting for you but you never come
Is this in my head, I don't know what to think
i will still waiting for you will say
"stay with me, Tabby you'll never have to be alone again
I love you and that's all I really know...
I'm sorry for keeping you waiting
its our love story , do not be afraid and just say yes..."
Sunday, February 1, 2009 10:44 PM
第五天了 =(
他还是不理人
心情还是有点槽
不要起床喔
家人一早就把我吵醒,
说要我到,“徐氏公会”吃早餐
我却迷迷糊糊地继续睡,不管他们
徐佩璇~ 你还真能睡喔

听了梁静茹的勇气
感觉好像我喔~

爱真的需要勇气
来面对流言蜚语
只要你一个眼神肯定
我的爱就有意义
我们真的需要勇气去相信会在一起

待在家像往常一样
旁晚时分,went to my bitch's place
因为待在家里,好闷喔~ 就没人在家除了我
大年初七~ 没人在家捞鱼生
还要跑到别人家捞鱼生,好不好意思喔~
aunty 的 homemade 鱼生 , 一句话“赞”~
连我这种讨厌吃鱼生的人都吃得津津有味
可见 aunty 的鱼生不是盖的喔

回家后就陪朋友聊天
10:28 AM
我想了很多
尽管怀疑和失望的袭击
我依然相信他的话和他
自从我告诉他我知道事实那一天起
我们都没讲到什么话
每天讲不到三句话
感觉他在玩弄我的感情
我却告诉我自己他需要赶 fyp
所以没有时间陪我
今天已经是第五天了

知道他暗恋了她一年多后
我就质问他,说他骗我...
我是不是太过分了?
为什么这样子?
当我觉得我快不能承受时
我要彻底地对他失望时
他却说了令我想再给他一个机会的话
他说相信时间能改变一切
我真的试着假装没事发生过而好好挽救这份感情
我真的相信我可以走出这个伤痕
要知道不是每个人受伤后,都能从新再来 !

话是说了没错
可是感觉他好像不理人
如果我不sms他,他就不会找我
send 的 sms 多数都得不到回讯
都不知道他最近在什么,只能瞎猜
受伤了五天,他连安慰和关心得话都没说
我想关心他,走进他的世界,让一切回到从前或更好
可是我不敢,因为我在等他的第一步

我相信奇迹是存在的
因为我所相信的神
是一个会创造奇迹的神
虽然奇迹没有真正的发生在我的世界
可是我却十分相信它的存在
Saturday, January 31, 2009 11:10 PM
wake up feeling emo again
but i tell myself 一定要振作起来
因为如果不振作的话,那些期待将会变成妄想
无论无何我把希望怀在我心里,努力地把这希望“生下来”
让希望诞生在这即将绝望的爱情
希望和坚信是奇迹的种子
只要我相信,神迹就会出现 ~

slacking at home til 3.20 pm...
meet kimberly at tampines interchange around 4pm
went to 陪 her to deposit money
then i treat her eat double cheese burger
follow by going to NTUC to buy green tea
at this point of time , Wesley Emo called us
suddenly say wanna meet us to go church... (=.=)
due to we gonna take bus 31 alight at Ite East
and walk abit of distance so it will take quite awhile
somemore Wesley is bebok station liaoz...
so we decided to meet at foyer 3 and walk into hall 8

the service was great ...
given GOD my every single cent and keep nothing for myself
really believing there gonna be breakthrough for the relationship
so no money to eat for dinner
but i know GOD is faithful
when you pour out your precious to GOD
GOD will hear from heaven and performs a breakthrough
so is worth it...

went home with kimberly again
at home laying on the bed , the "thing" keep huanting me again
i really believe there will be a breakthrough at the end of 3 months...
i do believe... please rain down your miracles...
Friday, January 30, 2009 11:45 PM
today my bitch keep what happening to me also (=.=)
still haven to tell her cause don't wanna let her worry
call her and talked to her on the phone for around 2 hours...
my mind still huants with a feeling which i don't know how to explain =S
she suggested me to catch some rest and rest my mind...
so i did what she says and in the end still did not help much...

现在我好怕睡醒后的感觉,睡醒后梦的天堂就会变成事实的残酷
我承认我会不够坚强,不够独立可是我真的不想做回以前的我

at night went to kbox at ang mo kio with Michelle , Wesley Emo and my bitch
we sang until 11 pm,
i send my bitch home cause she says she get something for me
guess what is a CoffeeBear Inspirational Torch
it says " Our Friendship will weather the storm "
she think i need some light in my life...

谢谢 主的爱永远与我同在
还有感谢我的 bestfriend,Kimberly,Michelle,
Wesley Emo,Kelvin Wong,心情医生,还有所有爱我的人
你门的关怀给我一丝丝的勇气去相信奇迹

我相信我就是我
我相信着他
我相信没有可能的事
我相信奇迹存在
我相信希望
我相信升手就能碰到天
我相信奇迹是坚信的种子
因为有你们在我身边
Thursday, January 29, 2009 11:01 PM
wake up at 3am plus...
cause i cant sleep again...
saw michelle's msn message...
so i reply but never expected her to reply
suprisingly she did reply...
she drank coffee so she could not sleep
she asked what happened to me...
intially i don't wanna say one
cause she will hate my guardian angel to the core after such thing has happened...
i think i should not keep any thing from her la...
indeed i knows she cares for me and is not fair to hide from her in a way...
before i tell her any thing , i've make sure she had promise not to do anything funny toward him...

is so sweet of her to skip her school
and come to my house early in the morning just 陪 me
actually i still don't wanna rely on any one...
i rather bear the pain myself cause i want to be strong and independent...
later on around 2pm plus , Wesley Emo also come to my place...
mainly is because of Michelle not me =P
Michelle took most of my 'N' level books home
they stay for around 2 hours more before we set off to Michelle's place
at her place , we decided to meet Kimberly at tampines to eat at Seoul Garden
it costs around $108.40 and is treat from Michelle and Wesley Emo
intially i tell them we can eat something cheaper one...
but they insisted and says they just want to make me feel better...
after the dinner , we shop at tampines mall for awhile more ...
went home with Kimberly as usual
while on the way , she says something really touch my wounded heart
but it still make me doubted...
5:58 AM
爱与不爱?
朋友与情人?
事实与谎言?
我已经渐渐分不清

爱的方向,我找不到
我在你心里还剩多少
还是我不曾在你心里 ?
今天就要坚强地过一天
关心我的人谢谢你们在我身边
你们的温暖是我从他身上得不到的
但是我还是不想太依赖你们
我得学着擦干眼泪
因为谁也不能永远陪谁

昨天勉强地度过一天
让我彻底的傻,再彻底的醒过来
如果再给我一个从来的机会
我还是选择爱你
没想过要和你分手
竟然我们都想信时间能改变一切
不然再我们多一个机会
你都说时间能改变一切
那我们就看三个月后
我们会变得怎样吧
Wednesday, January 28, 2009 10:06 PM
昨晚当我知道这事实
我马上拿手机打电话给他
想把事情问个清楚
可是他一整晚上都联络不上
发了他几个sms 叫他与我联络和我已经知道一切了,不要再瞒再藏
我只好打电话给 Kimberly
又不想让 Michelle 和 Wesley 知道
怕他们会对他怎样...
一个人对着天花板哭泣
一直告诉自己要坚强,要相信他
可是好难喔...
今早看到了他的回讯
他只回复了一个问号
我说 i knows something , do u lie to me ?
他又回复我一个问号
这次我就说,事实上你根本不爱我,一切都是你的谎言
因为他的博客写着 :好痛苦~ 和不爱的人在一起已经三个月了...
他却说 no and i don't know you talking about
我回他一句 : do u want me to tell you straight to the face that
you don't love me at all , the one you love is ***** ?
他又说 :i want what i doing , if i don't really love you ,
i will just reject you in the first place...
i scare my love for you is just 一时而已,therefore i tell
you before we start... as friend later on you said you don't
want therefore i told you about the 6 months thing... i always
try to love but basically 你的性格与我相差得太远了although you're
changing for me... times goes by i never think of breaking up with
you within the 6 months cause i think time can changes everything
读了他的简讯后,我回他这简讯 :我告诉你,就算我能变成你向往的我或尽管我们给再多的时间让它改变一切,只要你心里还有她不管我做得再多和努力,你都看不见因为你只能看见她...

后来他就没有回我的简讯了...我的心很乱,不知道下一步应该怎么走...到底选择分手好还是继续走下起 ?我真的已经很受伤,不知我能假装我不曾知道这件事或倔强地说不痛,在他面前假装什么伤都没有,好好的和他在一起吗?我爱他可是他心里有别人,我可以自私的把他留在我身边?约定还剩下三月而我们多相信时间能改变一切,不如再给彼此多一机会...希望这次能拥有一个美丽的结局,也愿他会好好珍惜这机会,让我看到爱会有奇迹和幸福是我们的结局...

他是有说过要先做个朋友让我们多了解对方后再在一起,而我相信的是竟然我们对方有感觉不如在一起
我也相信虽然我们并不了解对方,随着时间我们会多了解对方,接受彼此和能幸福的在一起... i do believe...可是那时他没有告诉我他一直都在暗恋着别人,我怎么会知道?如果他那时告诉我的话,我想
我们不会搞到像今天这样的局面...

想通了之后,我sms他说 :since we still leave 3 months to go and we both believe that
time can changes everything ,why not give the relationship one
more try ?let see what time can do for us... i will try my best
to walk out of this hurt and make things go back to normal as
soon as possible or else we both will feel very awkward...
seriously don't how to face you or rely on you now...

later part of the day
meet one of my ex at Plaza Singapura cause i asked him to 陪 me go 散散心
soon after we meet , i has a desire to go to a place
and it is none other St Andrew's Cathedral (圣安德烈座堂)
we walk to all the way form Plaza Singapura to the Cathedral
any way 每当我有解不开的难题或我对事情失去了信望,我都到那儿祷告
when i first step into the main hall , i already feel a warm and gentle feelings
then i bow down on my knees , before i could tell my Abba Father my troubles and hurts,i've already can't stop wept in the prescene...
after that went to Penisular Plaza , my ex bought me a hoody jacket to make me smile...
i really appreciate the gift...
soon we flag cab and headed to my place cause i feel so restless...
i tell i cant sleep since last night and scare that truth will huant me again...
is kind enough of him to 守在我床边 even though it did not help much...
now he has went home , i guess i will seek god to heal my wounds and strength to stand up in a few moments time...
Tuesday, January 27, 2009 10:51 PM
当你最相信的人
欺骗你的时侯
情爱的朋友你会怎么做?

当你最爱的人
玩弄你的感情时
你又会怎么做?

我也不知道这算不算玩弄和欺骗

我现在真的不知道该怎办...
我觉得应该是对大家诚实的时候了
其实今天已经是我和 guardian angel 在一起的三个月
我们是在10月27日2008年开始我门的恋情
没想到在我们在一起的第三月让我发现了这令我伤心的事实
我们原本在要等到在一起的半年后
再把恋情公开... 我想我们的“爱”可能即将结束
我也原本相信2009 会给我们的感情带来突破
原来是我错了...

今晚我去了他的博客看一看
saw a post which is protected
need a password to view
then it has a give away hint
says is the related person full name
saw a tag has a girl full name
at 1st i very struggle to view it
最后还是鼓起勇气去看一看
原来他一直得在暗恋别的女生

我也不能说他欺骗我
因为我们还没好好的谈过
可是现在我心里有一百个问号
我知道是我先喜欢上你
要不是那晚你吻了我
说你对我有好感,喜欢我
我不会鼓起勇气说出我已经喜欢上你
而暗恋你直到我对你没感觉为止
如今太迟了,你已经伤害了我
现在也是我无能为力的伤心

为何当初你不拒绝我 ?
竟然你已经暗恋她一年多
我宁可你当时拒绝我的爱
至少不会像现在这么伤心
明知道你爱的不是我
为何要欺骗你我的感情 ?
把我们俩搞到那么痛苦
现在已经太迟了
伤害已经造成了
要我怎么去接受这安排?

那晚你对我说
要在一起还是要分开
由我决定...
你什么都行,只要我开心就好
谁不想和自己爱的人在一起
当然我想都不想直接说我想永远和你在一起
那时我什么都不知道
如今我已经知道
我能自私的把你留在我身边?
你会委屈你自己和我在一起?

那时我们讨论的问题
你说你真的爱我
你不能 deny 你爱我
想疼爱我,一天一天的多了解我
每当你想靠近我
可是总有一种感觉把我们拉得很远
当你无法靠近我的时候
我就会觉得你忽略我
你也不好受当你无法对我好
这两月你一直想解决的方法
现在我真的不懂这是实话还是谎言
我多希望是真的
从来不觉得你会骗我
而我最相信的人是你

我想所有问题的开始
就是你不爱我
你心里只有她
不是我的小孩子气吧
亏我还是傻傻想为你改变,
为你牺牲,为你坚强
为了一个人根本不在乎也不会珍惜我的人
一身的伤痛,委屈的痕迹在你防备的眼晴都是零

我一直相信爱能克服一切
无条件为你不顾明天的安稳
为你变坚强,相信你的眼神
不敢想不敢问有一天坏的可能
我坚信只要我一直点温柔的对你好
总有一天你会感动...
原来是我太傻了
其实我真的不想和你分手
如果可以我宁愿什么都不懂
不知道我该过日子...
specially those few days...
我不想再依赖别人
你别说对不起,一句对不起不是万能的
你说不忍心伤害我,我可以在相信你吗 ?
Monday, January 26, 2009 11:37 PM
haha...
Today chinese year is so different from other years sia
1st time so late then go 拜年...
2nd go 拜年 without daddy and stepmother
3rd never went to motherside 拜年
but get mummie's place and never go her relatives there

then daddy pick us at 5.30pm mummie's place
went to ah ma's place to eat 团圆饭
meet up with my guardian angel
since he is at hougang 拜年
meet him at my downstairs and we walked to punggol park
and slack there...
is another enjoyable moment...
after that we went home...
i gonna sleep liaoz...
good night =)
5:54 AM
woohoo...
just came back from pub-ing
slacking at home doing nothing
sleep and sleep
after reunion dinner went to kimberly's place
took train to clarke quay...
waited for the late comers around 1 hours...
they are none other than Roy kor , Eric and Ah Neo
any way this is the 1st time i meet Eric and Ah Neo
we open 2 big bottle of Whisky then we finish 1 and 1/2 of it...
我们蛮回喝的嘛...
one thing to be proud of kimberly and i drank alot
in the end , is all guys 都晕了可是还没醉
after drinking , we went to the nearest Macdonald to eat breakfast
Lobang cab home =)
I super tired ...
better sleep now or else cant wake up and 拜年 liaoz
Saturday, January 24, 2009 10:42 PM
today nothing much ...
slacking at home
then meet Man Yau and Jun Quan at bugis station
and we went to service together
today kimberly , michelle and westly emo all never attend service...
and not much people going for fellowship
so i went home straigh away...
now home sweet home =)
Friday, January 23, 2009 11:46 PM
today wake up at 11am plus...
msn with her for awhile before decided to meet up
meet my bitch at her place 12 pm plus...
wait for her to finish bathing then we set off to compass point
went to eat kfc with one of her friend yuen ping
after that went to take meet kimberly at tampines
again she made me for wait her around 30 mins...
then we meet took mrt to habour front and took bus 30 to jing wen's place
any way today fellowship is BBQ at jing wen's place
i nvr eat any thing much in the BBQ
spending most of my time in the water
with michelle , He Shen and Justin
went home with kimberly again...
go home sleep ... =)
Thursday, January 22, 2009 11:12 PM
*21 jan 09 wednesday
then went to Clarke Quay met my guardian angel
i wait around 45 mins ... sobs...
i actually very 无聊 one , go there just 陪 him go back to yishun
so we took bus 851 , the journey took around 1.15 hours...
we spend most of the time standing in the bus
by the time we reach yishun interchange it was only 11 pm
asked him wanted to take bus 806 to go home
or walked to his house...
due to we thought it was still early so
we choose to walk...
we walk and chit chat until there's no bus for me
in the end , took taxi home...
thank god ,someone is paying for me...

*22 jan 09 thursday
slacking again
think about things again...
i seriously don't know how much longer i can hold on
cause there's still so much in my life
i still believing in my breakthrough is coming
cause my GOD reigns over every situation in my life
maybe it just need abit of time
Wednesday, January 21, 2009 3:45 PM
*21 january 09 , tuesday
slack at home the whole day again =(
but I has been thinking ...

why must force myself to grow up ?
I know I need to grow up but did I know the reason ?
changes is the only constant in life
changes itself is good
but don't know why the reason you should change
equal is to you change for nothing =)

To 心情医生
我一直都知道你喜欢我
可是感情不是以谁先认识我
对不起,我真的对你没有那种感觉
但我不能抵赖你是一很好朋友
我也知道你不想做我的朋友
可是我不能接受你的爱意
请你能谅解
2:00 PM
hehe... slacking at home again
nothing important = freedom
freedom = slacking / relax
Monday, January 19, 2009 11:23 PM
today meet my 心情医生 at plaza singapura , 1.15pm
actually wanna eat lunch before he go back to camp
due to i'm late so we was thinking of chua chu kang to eat
any way his camp is at chua chu kang
then we walked to pork mall to take bus 190
then he suddenly says he transfer to kelvin poh(傅晓章)'s cell group
kelvin says he long time never see me
and i guess we lose each other's number ba
then the two of them was imagining how was my gold hair look
bo liaoz right ?
my 心情医生 meet me just to see my hair lor...
before he went in to camp
he said something really lead me into deep thoughts
他说我长大了
好像不是以前那么小孩气的璇儿了
每一个人都有长大的一天
一步一步慢慢来
可是你为什么拼命逼自己长大 ?

我想要独立
什么才是真正的独立呢?

reach home 1st thing is sleep
wake up at dinner time
watch tv , surf net and slack in my room
played gunbound with my guardian angel
now chatting with my bitch
i guess gonna orh orh soon
Sunday, January 18, 2009 11:09 PM
is sunday again ...
nothing has happened as long as i'm at home =)
just wake up then saw my guardian angel msn me
says he wanna play gunbound with me for awhile
so we played then i keep kanna own...
i think he too 强 liao
he says he never 6 years touch gunbound
and never use 到 any formula , all pure feeling
i think i is noob la cause i like 4 years never play liaoz
i kinda of lose touch =)
then my stupid 小弟 came into the game room and play with us
no one invited him lor
somemore he bring someone come play with us
害我 feel damn paiseh la
then we play 2 vs 2
i teamed with my guardian angel
then we get kanna own also
but never mind at least we have fun
after that i went to sleep again...
don't know why i sleep quite alot now a days
Saturday, January 17, 2009 10:47 PM
today meet kimberly at 11.45 , tampines
then we shop from 12.45 to 3 pm plus plus
even though tampines and century square we shop until 闲
but nvm we still enjoy ourself ... =)
then we slacked at the sofa at the customer service
we started to chat about a very common topic
but yet she can give me a answer which out of the box
the topic if you caught your husband red handed on bed with a 狐狸精
what will you do ?

Kimberly :
she will walk towards the husband and say
not bad huh ... what a pretty girl...
must take care of her okay...
she give her wedding ring to the 狐狸精
and says he's your now
go home 带孩子走人

what a cute answer...

before i can talk any thing
she says , "your answer very standard one la"
open the door and saw it...
马上 run and cry
一句话多不用说

i wonder i will like that meh ? =.=

took bus 31 to Simei ITE
walked all the way to Expo
managed to catch the pre service prayer meeting
then enjoy the service
after service went to food court 找外婆
then went home after that...
reach expo early after why reach home early =)
i think i gonna chat online for awhile before orh orh-ing
12:42 AM
yawn ~ so tired
just reach home from cell group

*16 jan 09 Friday
slacking at home till 6.45 pm...
supposed to kimberly at 6.30pm , hougang interchange
guess she sms me at 6.05 am saying she will be abit late
so i leave my house at 6.45pm
guess what she reach hougang at 7.25pm
so it mean waited for 40 mins and maybe plus plus
so while waiting i went to do some shopping =P
wa liaoz... people like keep staring at my hair... (-.-")
when she reached hougang treat she to drink bubble tea
and accompany her do her hair extention...
reach cell group at 8.30pm...
1st time so late for cell la
the cell group people was like ai yo , your hair damn ah lian sia
haha... no matter they say , i just love my new hair look
miss the chance up with my guardian angel again !!! =(
since not gonna meet i took my own sweet time home
so we took bus 72 alighted at kimberly's place
send her to her house down stair and i took 40 mins to walk home
went to buy chocolate sundae while passing by the macdonald
now i super sleepy... zzzzzz...
Thursday, January 15, 2009 11:15 PM
Today wake up at 12 pm plus plus
slacking at home till 2.15pm then went out with mummie get my hair dye
reaching salon and stay for 5 hours i guess...
cause too many customer
finally i get my hair coloured...
i hightlighted my hair gold with dark brown base colour...
oh my god... i look damn ah lian la ...
reached home straight away sleep for 2 hours...
kanna waken up by my sister...
discuss what path i should take after the discussion
she help me to apply for the courses
then don't know why get kind of moody ~
then went to my room and cried
saw my guardian angel's sms asking how was my application
then i tell i need people to talk
kind enough of him agreed to let me call him
so now still talking to him and blogging at the same time ...
yeah, this is how was my day so far
and i think i gonna sleep after hanging up

around 45 mins to jeffrey's 19th birthday
right here wishing you a happy birthday
another 365 days of joy and a wonder birthday
Wednesday, January 14, 2009 3:12 PM
*13 january 09 Tuesday...
slacking at home the whole day again
-> Eating,Sleeping,drinking,playing,watching tv =P

Two things i wanna blog about

1. My Mummie is bringing me to dye my hair on thurday
still wondering what colour to dye
i want blond gold with orange highlight or what

2. God cares for you and me
around 2.am in morning
saw Foo Kai's sms
He send me a prayer
so sweet of him right ?
i ask him is it wei shan told him that i'm not doing well
then out of my suprise
while he's praying , he sense GOD to send me this prayer
i can't believe it at first...
GOD cares for me =)
i think my breakthrough is coming
cause i has been crying out for breakthrough everynight during my quiet time
indeed GOD listens to prayer
Tuesday, January 13, 2009 12:25 AM
argh ~
stop asking about my results !!!
because i did not did very well and is lower than my expections

hehe...
just come back home from ang mo kia...
went to go out with my guardian angel

today nothing much has happened
gotten my 'o' level result =(
meet my brother at the sweet talk between Xinmin and Bowen and go home together
go home and sleep ~
woke up liaoz... still feeling abit sad here and there...
i thought sleeping can don't let me think so much at the point of time
i guess it do not help much...
see a sms from my guardian angel asked me to choose my path carefully
but serious till now don't know what to choose...
心情很糟的我当然想出去散散心
好开心喔~因为有他陪我
他本来有事的,竟然抽空陪我
好感动喔~ (>.<)
可是感觉有点内疚因为他很忙还陪我散心
更令我感动当我说不想回家时,他说他可以陪我过夜
我正想关手机让每个人都找不到我,
可是他还得上学所以不好意思把他留下来
不想回家结果还回家了=P
时间不早了,我也该睡了

Answer to the curious people
stop asking me whether i'am attach to my guardian angel
or who is he...
the truth only me and him knows (plus some intimate friends)
maybe we are attached or maybe we are just very very intimate friends
yes or no , I'm not gonna say anything...
for me to know , for you to think =P
all i can says is time will reveal the truth
maybe is forever... muahahahahaa

Answer to my dear suitors,
i'm just not available
maybe is single but not available
maybe is attached that's why not available
hehe..
just one word I'M NOT AVAILABLE !

To guardian angel
thank for 陪-ing me the whole night ?
very bore right?
Monday, January 12, 2009 12:24 AM
Now is 12:24 AM
13.36 hours more to go !!!
gonna get my results at 2.00 sharp...
I'm damn scare now... (>.<)

thanks for those encouraging sms ...
i really appreciate them =)

To Manyua,Josefyne,Germaine,Haitang,Weiling
and Qinlin and all the o levers of 2008
we are come so far...
wish you all may you get the your desire grades...

To : Michelle
don't worry and do not be afraid...
i has been 'N' level before , despite i has been adsent for 4-5 months in
my 'N' level =P
many thought i will fail 'N' level and i almost give up on myself too
but i has proved them all wrong...
trust me if you just put need abit of effort ... the god will do the rest...
cause he has promised you will be the head and not the tail... =)

To guardian angel :
i thought our relationship has some improvement or even better... but now everything seem it has back to square... i'm somehow hurt by your hot and cold... i don't believe in putting into words into people so i not gonna assume anything... maybe is i think too much or you are just too busy... =) i think i guess should have some faith in you and stop being so insercure...

*Pastor Kong once said when you feel guilty , depressed , or angry at yourself,
writing a love letter to yourself is a powerful self-healing technique

To Myself :
Dear Tabitha
You are such an idiot ! I am furious at you being for so silly in this relationship and makes you look like a totally fool for him ! And then you sit around and whine and complain about his hot and cold... you are such a victim , it makes me sick. Poor Tabitha , so busy crying and waiting and keep on thinking the relationship will improves...well ,i'm tired of hearing this crap from you everyday...i hate when you act like such a helpless little girl,like a baby need people to good take care of you... i hate when you drive yourself to be understanding and give in just keep this relationship ,and then feel miserable about little things of what he does... it's your own fault! what is your freaking problem ? can't you see that you are hurting yourself ? it makes me feel disgusted to hear you everyone's pity on the phone about how overwhelemed. it's no one faults but yours , so stop being such a helpless and do
something about it... i'm fed up with your excuses.you're a grown up girl so start acting like one !!

Tabitha , it hurts me so much to see that you blamed yourself this way. it hurts me to see you working so hard that you cry at night because you keep everything to yourself. it makes me so sad to see you so tense and tight ,and act like nothing happened infront of him even though you're so hurted and desire he can show a bit of his concern because you don't wanna stress him ...it hurts me to see that little Tabitha is feeling like she will never be good for him, and that she always has to prove something to him...it make me feel so heartache to watch you put yourself down and compare yourself to his ex who you don't even know , instead of be secure of your unique nature... i feel so awful watching you go through your days half sleep because you are so worry... it hurts to see you treat yourself with acting strong when i know you need so much love.

i'm so afraid you will never let anything you do ever be enough. i'm afraid you will always stress yourself up and push yourself to the limit... i'm afraid that you will get yourself never love again if you keep working this hard. i'm so scared that you don't know how to love yourself. i'm scared that you will not stop to being so emotional , and you will commit suicide and it will be too late. i'm afraid that you will always worry what he thinks and won't just listen to your own heart. i'm so scared that your insercurites will run your life and ruin it... i see that frighten little Tabitha inside who thought he ignores you because you are irriating , and i'm so afraid she is so wounded that she never will heal. i'm afraid that you will always feel like that little Tabitha and will have to keep proving yourself the rest of your life... i'm afraid that you'll never realise you are special in your own ways...

i'm so sorry i don't tell you more how precious and special you are. i'm sorry i have been drving you to always to be understanding. i'm sorry i don't always care of you the way i should . i'm sorry that i compare you to his ex and make you feel you aren't good enough the way you are...i know how much you need me to tell i believe in you... i'm sorry that i never let you know how proud i am of you... i'm so sorry that you have such a wounded heart.please forgive me for pushing you so hard and never stopping...

i want you to know you don't have to do anything to get him to love you
more...i want you to remember that you don't have to prove anything to him... i hope you can ask your friends and family for support.

Tabitha , i love you so much. And jesus loves you even more. you give so much of yourself and you has grown up... i believe in you and am so proud that you have come so far and worked so hard on yourself... thank you for being so willing to change and grow. i am so proud of you for working so hard on your relationship and try to make it even better. i love you and always support you.
Jesus and i love you
Tabitha
Saturday, January 10, 2009 11:27 PM
This is my love langauge test result

My Detailed Results:
Physical Touch: 11
Words of Affirmation: 9
Quality Time: 5
Receiving Gifts: 3
Acts of Service: 1


About this quiz
Unhappiness in relationships is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. It can be helpful to know what language you speak and what language those around you speak.

i admit that i love my boyfriend to always hold me close and touch me with his kisses... also i love to hear words of love from my guy...
so physical touch and words of affirmation will make me so loved...

i realised that knowing your partner's love language is very important...
people will only loved where their love language is met...
Friday, January 9, 2009 11:32 PM
INTIMATE BLOG has created
only selected readers is allowed to view...
it records my true feelings and deep dark secrets ...
something which casual friend and hi-bye friend are not allowed to know...
please don't be upset if you are invited...
and respect my privacy... (^.^)
Wednesday, January 7, 2009 11:48 PM
i'm back...
is a enjoyable dinner...
we went to the food court and food center but all turned up to be so crowned
so we went to macdonald instead
something very paiseh had happened
when i collect my food and drink from the counter
suddenly the drink fall down from the tray and spill on the floor sia
damn paiseh la ...
hehe... at least we share his drink =P
after that we went to the bank to withdraw cash...
the we went to the park beside ang mo kia station...
slack there for around 2 hours... from 8pm plus to 11pm...
many may think go park also nothing to do...
i admit sitting at the park can be abit bored
but don't know why as long as he is around me
i feel so blessed amd times really files...
6:41 PM
in a few moment time , i gonna leave my home to ang mo kio
the story begin at 4.30pm in afternoon...
my guardian angel sms-ed whether i'm sleeping at home and he is going home from school
i asked him out for dinner , in the end his mother also never cook
so why not go out have dinner together...
so happy that i gonna see him ^^
i think it has been 2 weeks when we last hang out together
i hope it will be a fun and happy dinner with him
1:10 PM
yawn ~ just wake up
so nothing to say about today


* 6 jan 09 Tuesday
nothing much has happened...
wake up at around 12.45
first thing to do was check my handphone for time...
then saw a sms , it was a good morning sms from my guardian angel
there was so sweet of him ...
cause normally i'm the one sending morning greeting to him , sometime he dun even reply...
so surprise that 他主动 send a morning greeting ^^
after that stay at home , practised my vocal ...
so sing... sing... sing...
i feel like taking a afternoon bath due to the hot weather...
i realised i run out of shampoo and shower gel
( i get my personal shampoo and shower gel so i don't share with my family)
then saw his sms again so i replied i'm going out to buy things ...
he replied ,"enjoy buying your stuff"
sia la ... where get people ask someone to enjoy buying things ? kind of weird leh
i sms-ed back , " i go buy shampoo and shower gel , how to enjoy buying those things ? "
how to ?
imagine you go into the shop enjoy the moment buying shampoo , shower gel and etc...
abit sick right ?
then he said , shampoo don't enjoy during bathing then you want in the living room or drink is it ?
now i know he get enjoy the shampoo during bathing 的怪癖...
after that went take a bath and catch a nap...
after wake up , msn abit with my guardian angel...
then he say he is changing sleep style ... gonna sleep by 10 p.m
讨厌咯~ 以前我可是早睡的乖宝宝
熬夜不过凌晨十二点
为了和这群夜猫子聊天
(guardian angel , kimberly , michelle and etc cause they almost likly at night then online)
已经习惯了凌晨才睡
现在 michelle 已经开学了所以 she seldom online liaoz
then guardian angel 又要早睡
只剩下 kimberly 陪我聊天
我的夜间生活变得好凄凉~


Monday, January 5, 2009 11:50 PM
today i'm such a good girl...
stay at home the whole day...
actually wanna go out eat dinner one
due to i don't want to miss the final episode of “小娘惹”
so i decided to stay at home...
but i don't really like or like the ending sia...
after the show , I 马上 msn my guardian angel
tell him i don't like the ending but he says he find its okay le...
i was like what the ....
now still chatting with him...
我们在想情人节要怎么过...
cause valentine is a saturday and i get church on that day...
like usual after chatting with him , i go to sleep liaoz...

To guardian angel
你终于开学了
好好加油~
must 多多注意你的 time management 喔 =P
Sunday, January 4, 2009 11:36 PM
i was so bored at home...
meet one of my ex ( the one i met another day)
we went to ang mo kia hub to shop and catch a movie...
after the shopping and movie , i bought him to eat the kopitiam nearby my place...
thanks for today again...
now chatting with my guardian again
12:41 PM
yawn ~ just wake up...
see alot of food in the dinner table...
so stuff myself with food and rest awhile on the bed...
now chatting with my guardian angel on msn...

* 3 jan 09 (saturday)
woke up at 7.15am
kind of worry abt my guardian angel cause he yesterday whole day never online
call kimberly to chat , she keep saying don't worry la...
then is also other week that she is not going service again
so i'm so lonely again... =(
thanks god , guardian angel sms-ed me ...
at least i know he is alright... phew ~
went to michelle's place before going to service
flag a cab down cause we almost late for service... =p
after we went to e!hub for fellowship...
the initial plan is bowling don't know why we went to play arcade instead...
everyone is w193 and n246 play until very high sia...
we almost damage the table soccer sia...
haha...
the we all leave place around 12.am
reach home around 12.30 am and use msn
some idiot made me super pissed...

to some one :

i know what is behind my back...
you don't think i will find out right ?
don't need to act blur or innocent...
i treat you as friend but ...
i know you hate me la
say it out , please don't need curse and swear behind me one ...
i really impressed you can act well infront of me...
enough ~ you are getting me sick ...

*name is not mentioned to protect the person's idenity
Friday, January 2, 2009 10:30 PM
wake up , stay at home - eating , drink , sleeping , playing , watching tv ~
meet tampines at 6pm cause she need people to accompany her to cut hair...
after her cut , we went to macdonald to eat our dinner...
suddenly say wanna do hair extention... i was okay lor...
so we did a purple hair extention... very 姐妹 right ?

haha... her best friend came all the way to hougang just pass her 凉茶 and cookies wor...
due to she having sore thoat... so sweet , 好贴心喔~
多希望 guardian angel 也能为我这样 (>.<)
went to her home to watch “小娘惹”
then i went home straight after the show...
when i reach home , guardian angel never online... (he has something on)
i think i gonna wait for him online cause i enjoy chatting with him
Thursday, January 1, 2009 10:33 PM
wake in the late morning...
wash up and went to eat breakfast with my parents...
then shop and relax in ang mo kia hub with them
首先,先买过年的新衣
他们 in the end 说要看电影
起初,我是死都不想看
后来他们说如果我陪他们看电影
我要什么,他们都买给我
结果还是 so call 被他们收买了
看完了电影后,一家人出去吃著名的鱼头炉
回家后,睡了一会儿,再看“小娘惹”
now msn chatting with people =)
who ? i don't need to say...
Wednesday, December 31, 2008 11:45 PM
today is last day of 2008
everyone seem to have their own programme
我是 only lonely
那你说我该怎么办~
I'm only lonely =(
每个人都佳人有约
哪有时间陪我?

早上起床时,家里就剩下我一个人
我在家发呆
好无聊喔
play some games to kill time
玩了累就想睡觉
睡醒的时候,已经是晚上了
ate my dinner and went to my bitch's place for a while
since she not feeling well after work...
guess what ?
本来可以跟 guardian angel 去 count down 的机会
竟然毁在我手上
he sms-ed ask am I outside...
我只是在他发简讯后的 15 分钟才reply
没想到他竟会说 never mind , forget it ... =(

reached home , msn chat with my guardian angel

in a few minute time , it's gonna 2009
a brand new year and is the time to start a refresh
在这新的一年
我祝大家心想事成,事事顺利
愿神的祝福降临在你的身上
我希望能把2008年的不愉快给赶走
2009应该是一个美好的开始
2008最感伤的终点,2009化成感动起点
我正在期待着

2:57 PM
the past 2 days , i has not been eating or sleeping well...
so much things had happened ...
god , i seriously don't know how much longer i can hold on ...
how i wish i can be more independent !!!

on 29 dec , talked to my guardian angel about our relationship...
i started the topic by saying
when i look back... i realise i have change a lot..
in a way that i force myself to be independent or to grow up...
that was like so hard for me ...
i really hate this feeling la...

he said i always trying to 配合 him , which he think is unfair
he confessed that he really loves me
but he really can't do what i want from him
he always feel in between us that is always something lacking...
a things that he just can't put into words or explain...
every time he tries to close the gap , the gap like auto leave apart...
he knows i kept everything to myself and never say it out...
the more i don't say , the "weird" he will feel
but i just don't know how let him what is inside while we are in such a state...
i know he really wish understand me and find out what have gone wrong...
but he find it hard to really understand me more day after day
and the barrier is always there...
when this happened , i will started to feel neglected...

god , i really need your miracles...
you are the god who save relationship...
as we know there is something lacking between us...
please reveal us what is missing and teach us how to restore the relationship...
please grant me the faith to believe things still can be work it out ...
miracles will happened , as long as i believe !!!
i also believe in the power of visualisation and confession...
if i can see it , i can have it...
ask and it shall be given ,
seek and it shall be found
Tuesday, December 30, 2008 11:45 PM
stay at home do nothing till 4.30 pm
went out wth one of my ex...
he says he owe me birthday gift and christmas gift and ask me free to buy anything.. ^^
we shop from tampines to bugis then to town...
shop shop then chit chat then went home...
it has been awhile since we last went out and last send me home...

now i'm home , chatting with kimberly and my guardian angel... =)

To him ,
谢谢你为我做的一切
我今天真的玩得很愉快
而你送我的礼物,我会珍惜的
愿你也玩得愉快
璇儿 祝


Monday, December 29, 2008 11:41 PM
yawn~
just wake up...
sunday whole day stay in home spend time with family...
do nothing , play the sims 2 , eat and sleep...
chat with my guardian angel from 11 plus to 6 plus...
he very cute... keep asking me to go orh orh...
say what the more i wait for him the more guitly he will be...
cause he feel like he is torturing me...

Now going to play the sims 2...
blog again later... =)


Sunday, December 28, 2008 12:45 AM
nothing much has happened today...
wake up at 12 plus ...
slack at 4.15 then set off to service ...
meet jun quan on the way to service...
reached to service hall on the 1st praise song...
service is an interview with sun ho ...
went to fellowship and headed back home ...
now chating with my guardian angel online...
Saturday, December 27, 2008 12:30 AM
i bought my lappy out from place to place sia...
tell u , the lappy is very heavy..
last time ask my guardian angel to help me carry it
then he also complained it's heavy

went to meet michelle and wesley at her place
then we went to makan at macdonald in singpore post...
then michelle and kimberly gang up and say ,
"tomorrow newpaper 's headline - he die because he can't service ? "

we headed back straight back to her place after the meal
at michelle's place , wesley showed us some ghost video like "drilling to hell" and others...
we all girls get super scare sia...
rest in her place for around 1 hour plus after that kim and me set off to vincent's place...

in city hall station, we took the train which will terminal at yishun...
when we reached yishun station , i can't help but thinking of what happened to my guardian angel...
at that point of time totally no mood for cell sia...

reach vincent's place liaoz ...
our big chief , Bengamin, who study cooking at austrilia sliced off the tip of his thumb...
any way the meal is so delicious ... somehow he create his own spargetti saurce...
while we are playing in game , my guardian angel sudden sms me say nothing happened
but i still feel something is not right...

take bus 161 home...
on the way , i was super quiet and kimberly was like ,
"xiao mei ah , don't think so much la since he ardy says he is alright..."
maybe is i really think too much...

but still feel something is not right...
sms-ed my guardian angel said, "i can sense something very wrong... you're really alright ?"
then he replied , "ya"
no point of asking further so i said ," next time don't keep everything to yourself... even though i might not be able to do much but at least i'm always with you... =) "
then we chat online and he apologised for making me worry...
now chat with my guardian angel online , michelle and wesley on the phone at the same time ...
Friday, December 26, 2008 12:37 PM
haha... now blogging at kimberly's place ...
i called my guardian angel , he did on his handphone but no one answer
i send him a good morning message but he also nvr reply...
things is getting more and more weird...
just can't stop worry for him...
oh dear god , i prayed nothing has happened to him...
what can i do beside waiting for his reply and pray ?


after hanging with michelle and wesley on the phone and before sleeping
i went to pray , i played this song , " my god reigns"
because songs says , all my life in every situation , i know my god is greater ,my god is over all...
i had put my trust in the lord ...
all of my problems and all of my life i give you my lord...
let me fine rest my soul in christ alone...

kimberly and i will be going to michelle place later ...
5:45 AM
just finish chating with wesley and michelle on the phone...
we chatted for around 6 hours...
from 10 am plus to 5 am plus...

has been quite worry for my guardian angel...
read his blog , saw the post...
i don't know such thing happened to him
he normally don't know offline one...
indeed i feel something is very wrong , so decided to ring him up
out to my surprise ... he off his handphone...
hope nothing happned to him ...

i really cant sleep sia ...
thinking of praying for him before going to sleep ba
hope he will contact me as soon as possible
Thursday, December 25, 2008 7:17 PM
今年的圣诞节,一个人在家发呆
一整天都没有出家门半步
真的好不喜欢寂寞的感觉喔~
最讨厌和寂寞做朋友 !
大家都有自己的节目,而我呢?
眼泪都要流出来了,我真的好寂寞
都希望我的圣诞节是和“他”一起过的
现在就许下一个愿望
希望这是最后一个寂寞的圣诞节
2009 年的情人节会和“他”一起度过




1:35 PM
this christmas gonna spend it alone ...
staying at home and do nothing ~
the worse christmas ever !
1:59 AM
just reached home ...
meet kimberly jie and wester kor at my place to wrap the candies...
if without their help , i think mission impossible to complete wrapping 80 packets ...
thank you very much , i really appreciate their help...
after that went to tampines mall to shop for awhile before heading to service...
the service 's drama was good and went to vivo city to count down with my guardian angel , wesley and michelle...
when the time we reach the vivo rooftop , everything was over liaoz ...
so we hang out at habour front for awhile ...
actually wanted to stay over at michelle place one but parents don't allow
flag cab home instead...
when i reach home , saw people partying at my place ...
now i'm eating my dinner and blogging at the same time...
after blogging , i think i gonna catch my beauty sleep ...

last but not least...
merry christmas to all ~ !!!
may the god of peace come into you life...
Tuesday, December 23, 2008 5:45 PM
just reach home and super tired sia...
gonna sleep after blogging...

kanna waken up by my guradian angel's msn reply...
then look at the chat window , he asked me whether wanna go his house anot ?
i was like why not ?
so quickly wash up and changed and rush down to yishun...
due to his dad still have not leave the house yet so gonna hide at some where in the block first...
enter the house while his dad has went off...
we stay in the room chit chat , listen to songs , play with one another and sleep for awhile ...
so happy that he cooked instant noodles for me to eat ... (^.^)
must appreciate the things that people has done for you , no matter it is big or small thing...
showed him the youtube damn funny video , "golimar gone bad"
but then he is the first person who i showed the video and never laugh...
we go north point shopping for christmas gifts actually we have the whole day to ourselves due to sunddenly got something on so he need to leave ... =(
then i headed back home...

to my guardian angel...
thanks you for things that you've done for me
indeed it was so sweet of you...
i really love having you by my side...
ans see you tomorrow... ps i love you
Monday, December 22, 2008 11:56 PM
Now chatting online with my guardian angel , kimberly and michelle at the same time...
today supposed to meet my guardian angel due to i overslept can caused the meeting to be cancel... so he went to fix his friend's com instead of meeting up...

today nothing much had happened... is just sleep and eat or eat and sleep =)
12:14 AM
I finally found the back the happiness i used have with my guardian angel...
today early in morning wake in 5am...
go wash up , doll up myself ...
haha ... my Guardian Angel supposed to wake me up at 5.45 am
sadly to say , he fall asleep and thank god i'm able to wake up by myself
leave my house at 6 am and reach his house at 7.10 am...
at his house must hide in his room cause his dad does not know i'm coming ...
get into the house while his dad is sleeping...
wa lao , so we stay in the room almost for 13 hours...
stay inside chit chat , sleeping , play with each other ...
so sad that he not scare of "gu ji" so in ended up he keep (gu ji)-ing me
but i also know a way to revenage and i'm not gonna tell you all what is it ...
sneak out of the house while his dad was buying dinner for him
so i waited for 30 mins downstair then he came down and we walk around the neighborhood before sending me off...

after that meet wester kor in yishun interchange collect the gift he bought for me from korea...
( wester kor lives in yishun also)
then kor send me to take bus 854 home...
while on my journal home , my bitch called and we chit chat...
i spend alot of time guess what christmas she bought for me (=.=)

now i'm at home and chat with my guardian angel online ...
after eating finish my dinner gonna go sleep liaoz...
good night people...
Saturday, December 20, 2008 11:55 AM
today wake up and doll up myself
went to hougang mall macdonald to buy double cheese burger plain for kimberly ...
slacking at her place for awhile before heading to service...
then i complained i super hungry so we went to chicken rice and i treated her
after i found out something quickly ask her to follow me home ...
slacking at my place for awhile and this time round we really heading to service



haha... michelle and me "ba ka" to wear the same dress to service...
while i walked into the hall , super paiseh sia ...
then today service is the candle light service sia ... the hall was filled with candle light , so beautiful...
today also get to found out that actually vincent have a younger brother who study australia and is also my cell member...
Bengamin , welcome home and welcome back to city harvest church !!!

during service pastor kong enlighted us how to use the " s.m.a.r.t.e.r" goal setting card
in school they usually teaches the "s.m.a.r.t" card
but we are christian so get better adventage with the power of god and we can set "s.m.a.r.t .e.r" goal...

Specific
measure
action plans
realistic
time
expection management
revelation

then pastor also say something funny if you nvr get your facts correct while using the card
for example...
a sister fall in love with a brother and set goal to get attrach to him

specific - he is the one
measure -we are around the same age
action plans - get into his life
realistic - yes
time - 6 months

any one can set smart goals but without expection management and revelation...

expectation management - don't know...

revelation - dun know...

then the sister found out that the brother was married

after went to fellowship with the cell ... bengamin , wesley emo , michelle , janelle , kimberly and me stay in group and fellowship ... we talked abt ghost stories and weird food like cat rice , monkey brain , guinea pig meal , rabbit satay and kangaroo meal ..... Eeeeeeeeeeee ~ after fellowship went to bebok to take bus 87 home...





12:40 AM
today went to sentosa with the cell...
and kimberly leave half way during the outing cause she feel too boring...
then after the outing we went to vivo city to makan
then jun quan send me home cause he lives opposite my place...
but i feeling abit emo so we went to punggol park to chit chat before head back home...

when i'm home , chatting with kimberly , michelle and guradian angel...
so shocked to heard he says , " is me to say sorry for neglecting you"
i'm so suprised that he knows he has been neglect me and i always thought he does not know...
so happy that he asked me to go his place this sunday to watch movie or something...
i decide i must change myself in this 4 months ...
Wednesday, December 17, 2008 2:27 PM
this lyrics edited from jolin tsai 's 倒带 to express how i feeling... when i editing the original lyrics , i did not add or remove the number characters... so even you try to song , it will still fits the rythm of the song ^^
i enjoy singing my version 倒带

我受够了等待,你所谓的安排
说的幸福到底多久才来 ?
总是要来不及,才知道我受伤
我想依赖而你却都不在
应该幸福的恋爱,你给的全是敷衍
一个人傻傻等待,找不到你给我疼爱
我在幸福的门外,却一直都进不来
你累积给的伤害,我是真的很难释怀

总是觉得爱以不在,而你总是不曾明白
最后我把话说开,哭着求你留下来
终于明白爱以变坏,我们面前太多阻碍
我的手却放不开,宁愿没出息求你别离开

你总是要我乖,慢慢计划将来
我的不安却一直找上门
过去怎么交待你该给的信赖
被你亲手缓缓推入悬崖
从我脸上的苍白,看到记忆的甜美
过去甜蜜在倒带,只是感觉已经不在
而我对你的期待,被你一次次摔坏
已经碎成太多块,我还想拼凑跟重来


总觉得你爱以不在,而你总是不曾明白
最后我把话说开,哭着求你留下来
终于明白爱以变坏,我们面前太多阻碍
我的手却放不开,宁愿没出息求你别离开
1:50 PM
today nothing much has happened...
in the evening , michelle and wesley emo at the bugis juction...
1st we help michelle to choose the christmas gifts
i bought michelle and me the same dress and other dress for myself only...michelle was so delighted when i bought the dress... but i should be greatful to her also...
infact i also like that dress but she dun mind to have the same dress which also the same colour ...
for some people i know they don't like to have the same shirt , dress , jeans or skirt with others... in other word, what they have , you can't have !!! i really hate that kind of people la !!!

after shopping , we went to the park near to michelle's place and chit chat ...
while we are chit chating , wesley emo fall asleep ...
talking until 1125 , i take bus 80 home...

at home , chat with michelle and kimberly abit on msn then we all call kimberly for a mini prayer and we prayed each other's needs... ended up only michelle and i do the praying , kimberly and wesley emo just talking in tongues... we prayed for strength , healing , refreshment and financal freedom...

people , i admit that i'm going a very tough time even though it seem liked nothing happened...
something happened within the family , my relationship with friends and "that someone" , fears of the 'o' level and stress has been haunting me late at night and caused me to have restless night ... please keep me in prayer... thanks... i would like to be pray for emotion healing , strength to stay stronger , refreshment of the holy spirit ...
Monday, December 15, 2008 10:48 PM
Not feeling well but still blogging...
my sister's boyfriend comment that my face is super pale sia...
then jie was , " oh dear , what happened to you ?"
i guess i just need to rest abit more will do ...
cause i have been sleeping very late now a days ... (chat with guardian angel online )

today wake up in the morning ...
go hougang mall buy christmas gifts for cell group members
i spend quite a lot on the gifts ... thank god , daddy get sponser abit so or else (T.T)
busy trapping the gifts until i fall asleep ...
wake up at dinner at dinner time...
i spoil the new safa set ... oops...
today , i'm so lonely ... everyone is busy...
kimberly busy , michelle busy , guardian angel busy and it seem the world has no time for me...
Sunday, December 14, 2008 6:59 PM
Friday 12 december
wake up and bored until 12 45 pm
meet kimberly jie to go for present hunt we walked from town to marine square to suntec city
then we meet up with michelle babe and wesley emo and set off to cell group...
they 3 power sia , just know each other less than 1 hour get the common topic liaoz...
some more they li siao me with broom broom then i was super pai seh la
during cell , we have various workshop like sport , guitar , cooking and beauty...
actually i don't wanna go any various workshop , foo kai assigned me to cooking then i okay lor...
i think kimberly enjoy the cooking workshop sia...
we learnt how to bake brownies ... (^.^)
due to the time , jing wen have to bring our done brownies home and bake them...
after the cell meeting , we went to the near by indian coffee shop and celebrate michelle's birthday...
went home with kimberly , don't know why the bus sign says to bebok interchange but it stop in changi airport don't know why which only allows pass holder ... alighted and take 89 home instead...

Saturday 13 december
meet kimberly at 2 plus to go East Point before going for service
reached East Point at 3 plus , shop for around 1 hour plus...
meet wesley emo at bebok mrt and we went to church from there...
At expo , saw so many cosplayer... gt naruto , shaman king , final fantasy and many many more...
during service altar call , kimberly finally make her re-delication to god and teck loon's friend , jeric has also make his first decision to accept christ... congrats to the two , may god bless them...
then after service , got back the brownies which i had make from jing wen...
we set off to airport terminal 3 to fellowship...
after fellowship , managed to pass the brownies to my guardian angel... =)
At home , waiting for 1 hour plus before my guardian angel online...
i was saying he like ceo , must book in advance...
i asked he out for christmas but he say his sister booked him 2 months ag0... =(
chat with him from 12 plus to 3 plus then i called him and we sleep together in the phone like last time...

Sunday 14 december
went to eat breakfast with daddy they all at serangoon north...
while daddy talking talking to his friend i went the "house of chinchilla"
play the rabbit and chinchilla again...
reached home sleep sleep sleep till now....
Thursday, December 11, 2008 9:21 AM
just wake up !!! yawn ~
sleep for the whole afternoon again...
then wake up msn-ing till 2 am plus talking on the phone with kimberly till i fell asleep...
later be meeting her at 2pm at tampines...
people if you all saw me there , feel free to say hi cause i don't bite...
tomorrow will be michelle's sweet 16 birthday liaoz...
she seem kind of moody
managed to chat with her in msn abit here and there (most of the time chatting with kimberly)

The greatest gift of all is LOVE
love is suffers long and is kind ;
love does not envy ;
love does not parade itself , is not puffed up ;
does not behave rudely ,
does not seek its own ,
is not provoked ,
thinks no evil ;
does not rejoice in iniquity , but rejoices in the truth ;
bear all things , believes all things , hopes all things , endures all things
LOVE NEVER FAILS
I BELIEVE IN THE POWER OF LOVE

To michelle
i know you feel kind of disappointed with people...
do not let this disappointment get you...
i will pray for god's peace to be upon you
and at the same time please try to smile when time are bad =)
Wednesday, December 10, 2008 5:40 PM
don't take too long to say "i love you" to the one you love
you will never what happened in the very next second
love is a sense of security to your love ones...
this christmas let your love ones who you know love them


The "I love you"s

Afrikaans-Ek is lief vir jou!

Albanian-Te dua!

Amharic-fekrishalehou!

Arabic-hiboke (m to f), Nohiboka (f to m, or m to m)

Armenian-yes kez si'rumem!

Basque-Maite zaitut!

Bengali-Ami tomake bahlobashi!

Bosnian-Volim te!

Bulgarian-Obicham te!

Catalan-T'estimo!

Creole-Mi aime jou!

Croatian-Volim te!

Czech-Miluji tev!

Danish-Jeg elsker dig!

Dutch-Ik hou van je!

English-I love you!

Esperanto-Mi amas vin!

Estonian-Mina armastan sind!

Farsi-Tora dost daram!

Filipino-Iniibig kita!

Finnish-(Mä) rakastan sua!

French-Je t'aime!

Frisian-Ik hald fan dei!

Galician-Querote!

German-Ich liebe dich!

Greek-S'ayapo!

Gujarati-Hoon tane pyar karoochhoon! tane chaahuN chhuN!

Hawaiian-Aloha wau ia 'oe!

Hebrew-Anee ohev otakh (m to f), Anee ohevet otkha (f to m), Anee ohev otkha (m to m), Anee ohevet otakh (f to f)

Hindi-Mai tumase pyar karata hun (m to f), Mai tumase pyar karati hun (f to m)

Hungarian-Szeretlek!

Icelandic-Eg elska thig!Ido

Indonesian-Saya cinta padamu!

Irish-t'a gr'a agam dhuit!

Italian-Ti amo!

Japanese-Kimi o ai shiteru!

Korean-Dangsinul saranghee yo!

Latin-Te amo!

Latvian-Es tevi milu!

Lithuanian-As tave myliu!

Malaysian-Saya cintamu!

Mandarin-Wo ai ni!

Marshallese-Yokwe Yuk!

Norwegian-Jeg elsker deg!

Polish-Kocham ciebie!

Portuguese-Eu te amo!

Romanian-Te iubesc!

Russian-Ya tyebya lyublyu!

Sanskrit-twayi snihyaami

Serbian-Volim te!

Sesotho-Kiyahurata!

Slovak-Lubim ta!

Slovenian-Ljubim te!

Spanish-Te amo!

Swahili-Nakupenda!

Swedish-Jag älskar dig!

Tagalog-Mahal kita!

Thai-Phom rug khun (Male speaker) Chan rug khun (Female speaker)

Turkish-Seni seviyorum!

Ukraini-Ya tebe kokhayu!

Urdu-Main tumse muhabbat karta hoon!

Vietnamese-Anh yeu em (m to f), Em yeu an (f to m)

Welsh-Rwy'n dy garu di!Xhosa

Yiddish -Kh'hob dikh lib!

Zulu -Ngiyakuthanda!
9:35 AM
Ohayou people =)
just wake up...
thinking of something right now...
i'm planning to make small christmas gift for both cell group N246 and W193
but don't know how to get for them
i would like to make something small and simple...
any idea for the christmas gift please kindly tell me...
still no idea what to get for them =(
and i had already discuss with kimberly , most likely on friday we gonna go for present hunt

oh ya... kimberly and i had decided to go for christmas and new year count down...
so far only we two are going...
so we need more people to come along .... the more the merrier
mostly likely is going clubbing ...
this invitation only for those know me , no strangers unless is my friends' friend
any one interested please kindy sms me =)
Tuesday, December 9, 2008 5:30 PM
Today woke by kimberly's jie...
at 8.15 am she called to wake me up
" xiao mei ~ , wanna sleep until time huh !? you said 9 am at my place now what time liaoz ?"
wa lao , quickly wash up and meet her...
dunno why i can reach her place so fast i took around 30 mins to reach...
which faster than usual ...
she was so shocked that i reached her place at 8.55 am
she praised me... haha...
" finally you are early... hope everytime also like that..."
i was like (=.='')
i know whenever meeting people i will almost likely to be late

this time round the always early guys , Bernard kor , was LATE...
then kimberly got pretty angry...
she took out her hp , click the game , " HAPPY TREE FRIENDS"
which you spin the characters off the swing , see how they die...
mostly is brain , eye balls came out and head crack , head came off blah blah...
for those who watch HAPPY TREE FRIENDS , then you should know what i talking about
then she keep shouting "shi bernard , cho bernard"
then she even pull my hair says
" xiao mei dun try any thing funny , or else i take cut off your beautiful long hair"
i was like some one please help me...
the moral of the story , do not offence kimberly !!!

then while we are talking receive a sms from joshua
said what want me to send my photo which in my photo cause i look very beautiful...
then i replied you need the photo for what ? use to PCC is it ?
he idiot reply what ya lor ya lor...
i was like omg , i eating le... (T.T)
*pcc = pa ciu cheng -----> masturbation in hokkien

after the breakfast , walk around hougang mall with kimberly jie and bernard kor...
then send kimberly to talk bus 72 and i go home and sleep... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

this is how my day so far...
Monday, December 8, 2008 12:45 PM
很多事我是知道的 ,
很多事我不想多说 ,
以免和他又起冲突
随便他吧... 只要他快乐就好...
他要怎样,我已无所谓了
不管是真心爱我还是玩弄我,我不管了
只要能在他身边,就已经是一种幸福 !
所以我不再渴求他什么
不管他对我是好是坏...
他对我说他是真心喜欢我
他就是他
所以我相信 =)

9:29 AM
Wa lao... early in the morning get awoken by a irriating sms...
someone just sms me and confront me without getting the facts right !!!
when did i say i'm rich after working at venture era ?
when did i bought myself a laptop ?
all i know is i'm quiting at my job and i did not earn much
my finance is still pretty tight cause my parents do not give me allowance any more and now i depend on my savings for my personal expenses
regarding the laptop , did i use the word BLESSED ?
it is a gift from my sister...

I know you're reading ,
FUCK OFF LA...
i just hate people who did not get the facts right and YAYA PAPAYA go confront others...
ask nicely is still alright but not confront okay ?
get this into your BLOODY brain , you have this fucking attitude problem which almost everyone talks about it...
do you know is very irriating and disgusting ?
actually i don't want to say this to you one ...
but don't know how many you have do it ?
i'm sick and tired of this SHIT...
say what wanna change for better...
is this the result u wanna show me ?
if you treat me nice , i will treat you nice back
but you being nasty or what then don't blame me
in fact you have no rights to flare at me cause you started it first...
FUCK what i say , it don't mean SHIT now...
FUCK what i did ,is your fault some how...
hey you thought you could really win my heart , i have better guys wooing me all along
but i still spend time so much with you , you're proud ?
i used to consider you could be someone important to me even thought we cant be couple
i should know that you're not gonna change
you always pms...
you're right when it's wrong
you're wrong when it's right
sorry if i write things that hurt you...
but you hurt me more than this shit...
please stop bother me any more
i dun wanna see your sms in my hp any more..

* name is not mentioned to be protect the person's identity
Sunday, December 7, 2008 8:48 PM
有些人就是不把自己的恋情公开
这样恋情真的是很辛苦
往往一定有人因不公开的恋情而受伤
我有几位朋友就是这样
害怕自己同学,朋友,家人或教会的人知道
就是因为别人不知道他们在一起
那别人怎么和他们的男友或女友保持一定的距离?

比如我有一位朋友不让同学知道他们的恋情
结果自己的男友和他的好姐妹因为酒后玩得有点疯
当着她的面前接吻 !
可是她也不能说什么

还有一个
不想让教友知道他们的恋情
结果那个男的在她的面前和 cell group 的一个女孩
在礼堂里玩起你抓我,我抓你的游戏
两人靠得十分近,她看了眼里真的不是滋味
更遭的是即使女孩已经露出不高兴的眼神
男孩竟然还不收敛!
那女孩也没告诉他自己的感受,装着没事...

我本人觉得如果不想把恋情公开的人应该也自知分明自己好歹是有男友或女友。和别人玩得再疯再野,男友或女友瞪一眼就要收敛。

*收敛 = 减少放纵的程度 (指言行举止)

4:30 PM
haha... finally able to blog from the my room with my lappy...
cause my family just get a router so I can no longer need to depend the stupid computer...
I just simply love my lappy...

now i have been hugging the pooh bear which my guardian angel bought for me here and there soon after daddy thought i like pooh bear so he just bought me a pooh bear with a christmas hat...

then i tell him straight to the face that i don't really like pooh bear
but it is because is is a gift from my guardian angel so that why i treasure like it hell
then daddy just take the pooh bear (the one daddy bought) and throw on the floor and pretend pretend to wrack it and stuff
i just stand there hugging the one my guardian bought and smile...
daddy ask this , both are pooh bear but different treatmet sia...
then i got nothing to say...

after blogging , i'm gonna take an afternoon nap and see what programme i have tonight...
most likely is to stay at home and slack...
Saturday, December 6, 2008 10:19 AM
Ohayou...
Thank god i still can wake up at this time...
early in the morning at 05 : 34 :04 am
被 kimberly's sms 吵醒...
她心碎的找我陪她
看到她这样,真的想马上飞到她的家照顾她
可惜太早了,所以不能出门 at least i called to keep accompany her
poor kimberly... 我心疼你 !

To kimberly :
我知道你难过但你一定要坚强 !
再加上朋友的背叛...
不发生什么事我永远站在你这边...
怎么说我都是过来人所以我明白你的心是怎么想的
还记得我为情自杀被送进医院的时候吗 ?
你一整晚守在我病床边都不离开
从小都是你在照顾我
现在让我呵护你,保护你和照顾你
他走了,带不走你的天堂
因为他有自由走, 你有自由好好过日子...
你很爱他,这谁不知道
有时爱不需要拥有或天长地久
只要付出过真心就以足够
如果我的他想离开的时候,
虽然我多不舍得,我还笑着和他说再见
因为我用真心对特我们的爱
他可以说我常骗他还是什么
但我觉得我不需要跟谁交待或解释什么
你知道我没有骗过他以足够...
现在你正在爱情过敏的季节
好好调整你的心情
别想那么多
小妹永远陪着你
Friday, December 5, 2008 3:04 PM
wake up at 6.30am , send a good morning to my Guardian Angel
the went back to sleep again sia...
later on was wake up by painter's arrival...
the paint smell make me can't sleep sia... (=.=''')
i'm hugging the pooh bear to sleep all the whole night and i carry it where ever i goes...

大姐 decided to bring me and 小弟 go bishan watch the movie , "wild child"
the movie a spoil brat girl was send to boring school in england
at first she tries to break every single rule just to get herself expel from school and goes home
then her best friend betray her and blah blah while she was away...
the rest i shall not said or else i will spoil the suprise for those will are going to watch ...
5 stars ... i love this movie... is a good choice to watch...

dots... now the painters are still painting the rooms...
smell was yawks....

later kimberly is going to my cell meeting ...
gonna catch a afternoon and meet her early or else she will yell at me again...
Thursday, December 4, 2008 10:08 PM
Woo hoo~ just reach home !
A few things to say about my day

1) The gift from my Guardian Angel is so FUCKING CUTE la !!!
I just simply love it ...

2) Just get to know a guy who work in mini toon at tampines mall
He's quite cute looking , too bad he is not my cup of tea
His name , i'm not gonna reveal it...
Is to in case , people go and disturb him during his working

3) meet a mad guy in bus 72 while on my way home...
So scary sia...
the whole bus no one dare to sit near him lor...
at least 5 rows from him is empty and he sat all the way in the back
he's talk to himself and say something very funny and eerie as well
his tone is like an ah beng sia like 不爽 , come 找我啦 !
say like he wanna kill people , what terrorist , take gun blah blah
say what his hair funny , wanna rebonding 5000 times...
then i whisper to kimberly's ear that i was damn scare la
i guess he heard what i said then reply me ,
" DON'T WORRY , 我不会杀你们的所以不要怕 ! "
wa lao , the bus people were like wa lao after you said this , 我才要更怕
alighted with kimberly which 2 stops early than my stop...
sobs... walk all the way home just to get out of the bus ASAP

* 我不是怕 Ah beng , 只是怕靠近神经病 !

4)busy taking photo with my beloved Pooh bear (guardian angel buy one)
i will try to update the photo to the computer asap
11:42 AM
argh... early in the morning
woke up to use the computer
don't know what happened to the fucking computer
keyboard can not be used
wanted to plug the internet cabel into my lappy to surf the net
in the end got scolded because of this
now using on-screen keyboard to blog
so 不方便啦 (=.=)


any way spent an enjoyable night with my guardian angel
i find that he can be a fun loving guy who talks lame things ...
dots...

soon after , i going down yishun and collect my LONG-WAITED present...
FINALLY get to see it , feel it , touch it and smell it...
planing to meet kimberly jie after that...

i think my day will be fun today... =)
Wednesday, December 3, 2008 7:04 PM
haha... one thing to share with everyone !!!
which i' blessed with a lappy and now using it to blog...

I LOVE THE LAPPY...

now at kimbery's house and we blogging beside one another...
she complained that my desktop is fucking pink...
i like it so what she do ? kill me huh ?
haha...

just now while on our way to kimberly's place
saw a accident , and the car plate was 9940
which sound like 久久是你
then kimberly “教坏我”
ask me go buy 4D AND 这是我第一次买 4D

any way gonna meet my guradian angel for dinner later =)

To michelle ,
gal... i really thank you for praying with me in your room
i can say the presence of god is very strong...
i love the meeting prayer , hope we can come together and pray again
thanks for the things you had prayed and the word that the lord had for us...
i'm deeply empowered by it
remember this , we are not living for any one but for god and ourselves
let we learn not to run to people first instead of god
i will continuosly keep in you in the prayer
and i also believe our vision of being a worship leader will come to past =)
jia you... i love you
Tuesday, December 2, 2008 8:25 PM
Sorry that i had misunderstand you again...
now i realise what the problems between me and you...
i guess there's alot more for me change ...

* some tips for preventing relationship problems-brainstormed by xuan'er
1) must learn to trust
2) must understand the situation , eg his sim card problem
3) must become more mature
4) must HONEST to each other
5) must be supportive of one another
6) must give in to each other
7) must let each other have their personal space
8) must not be jealous easily
9) must be slow to judge
10)must never be defensive to each other
11)must forgive and forget each other's mistake
12)must be accountable to one another
13)must only be vulnerable to your parnter
14)must not say hurtful things to your parnter
15)must know to appreciation one another
16)must sensitive to each another
17)must be sercure with the relationship and your partner
18)must know how to fight fair
19)must not drag the past into relationship eg : ex boyfriend / ex girlfriend's goodness
20)must quick to mend the relationship when things went wrong
6:10 PM
*ADORE
BY :Paramore

I don't mean to run
But Every time you come around I Feel more alive, than ever
And I guess it's too much
Maybe we're too young And I don't even know what's real
But I know I never...

Wanted anything so bad
I've never wanted anyone so bad

If I let you love me
Be the one adored
Would you go all the way
Be the one I'm looking for
If I let you love me (If I Say)
Be the one Adored (It's OK)
Would you go all the way (You can stay)
Be the one I'm looking for

Help me come back down
From high above the clouds
You know I'm suffocating, But I blame this town
Why do I deny
The things that burn inside, Down deep I'm barley breathing
But you just see a smile

And I don't wanna let this go
Really I just want to know

If I let you love me
Be the one Adored Would you go all the way
Be the one I'm looking for
If I let you love me (If I Say)
Be the one Adored (It's OK)
Would you go all the way (You can stay)
Be the one I'm looking for

If I let you love me
Be the one adored
Would you go all the way
Be the one I'm looking for (x2)

If I let you love me (If I Say)
See the one adored (It's OK)
Would you go all the way (You can stay)
Be the one I'm looking for
2:12 PM
1st thing early in the morning
look at my beloved hp...
see no sign of his sms...
feeling emo...
call michelle and wesley to pei me
so we meet at tampines...
after we eat our breakfast then we set off to michelle's place
so now i'm blogging at her place

SOMETHING HAPPENED AGAIN !

can i just blame myself for such a thing... ?

To my Guardian Angel...
i'm so sorry to say such a thing to you...
deep inside i care for you more than any one else...
i beg you no matter please stay by my side...
i feel heartache when you said i'm getting too much and more like a stranger to you...
i'm feel so stupid , why cant i just trust you're serious about loving me... ?
Even you're not serious abt me , i will also more than willing to be your toy...
i realise i came to point that i can't move on with my life without your presence
when i was helpless , and you came to with kindness...
and to me , you're always sweet and nice guy...
i really love being around you
7:44 AM
Morning people....
After blogging , i will be going back to sleep
I don't want to stay awake to cry or what
So sleeping make time files...
yesterday my Guardian Angel didn't contacted me at all =(
still haven heard of him...
i wonder what happened to him...
my heart hurts...
i guess i gonna sleep the whole day...
Monday, December 1, 2008 5:23 PM
29 Nov
*Saturday Night...
Poor Kimberly 抱着我哭了一整个晚上
看到她这样,我好心疼她好想安慰她可是我也是别人伤害了
Pepared a extra mattress for her to sleep
but she insisted to sleep beside me in the same bed...
结果我们一整晚都没睡, 两个伤心的女孩躺在同一床到天亮
i waited for Guardian Angel to sms or call when he's free
in the end never heard from him at all...

30 Nov
* Out to Malaysia
Hoping he could not call or sms me before i enter malaysia
and also saw my sister scolding to her boyfriend on the phone...
cause the boyfriend still never contact her after she send a sms saying we're at the singapore custom....
I get kind of sad la... My guardian Angel still never contacted me...
My sister scolding at her own boyfriend saying ,
" what is how much you freaking care about me.... .... ...."
then i was think how much i worth in my Guardian Angel's heart
while i'm shopping i heard this song sang by JJ 林俊杰
“Sarang hae yo means i love you
代表着我离不开你... ... ...”

突然想起
他 send 的一个sms 写着 Sarang hae yo
他第一次把我抱在怀里的时候
第一次说喜欢我的时候
以前的快乐时光
就忍不住哭了

1 December
force myself to sleep the whole day
现在是中午 5.23 分
Guardian Angel 一整天都没有找我
我好想他喔
going to leave my house soon
going to tampines to meet kimberly jie
hope she will hug hug me later
Saturday, November 29, 2008 10:32 PM
Today Westor and kimberly jie thay all celebrated my birthday
due to I will be going Malaysia tomorrow and they're only free today...
because of this , i choose not to attend service today

During the outing
Kimberly is feeling emo due to something happened in her life
then she spread her emo-ness to me and i wanna cry too...
cause some thing reminds me of my Guardian Angel ...
i look at my handphone and never saw his sms...
Don't know why kind of miss him , hoping he 下一秒就在我身边
I think i'm just used to having him by my side
Kimberly said 不想一个人在家
所以呢 我接她去我家住一晚

Now she is in my room while i'm blogging in my living room...
i feeling so emo too,